I'm An Ordinary Human

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

Can you imagine what life would be like without love? No love for a newborn baby, no pets that love us, no partner's love for us? Can you imagine what you would feel like if you could not feel emotion?

Is it worth giving up the experience of beauty and joy and love in order to end pain and suffering? The Giver

The Giver

Last night I watched a movie with Meryl Street, Brendon Thwaites, Jeff Bridges, Katie Holmes, Alexander Skarsgard, Odeya Rush, Cameron Monaghan and Taylor Swift. From great suffering, they formed communities as a solution. Disorder became harmony. With a daily dose of medication each person's emotions are kept at bay. They have no feelings of anything other than contentment. Their morning injections take their emotions away. 

How many people in our world take medications to reduce emotional pain and feeling so that they feel nothing. Anti-depressants do not heal they mask pain. Pain is the source of awakening and a catalyst for our healing and growth.

The movie is centered around the character Jonas who lives in a colorless world where there is conformity. There is no conflict, no competition, lying, arguments, fighting or struggle. 

Jonas begins to receive memories of the old world. His first memory is that of a sled in the snow. As color begins to return to Jonas rather than seeing a monochromatic world, Jonas begins to see the color red, in apples, which represents passion and love. He uses his apple to receive his daily injection, rather than have his emotions eclipsed by drugs. As he begins to feel love, he changes and understands he has to bring love to his community or die trying.

Their entire world is based on contentment. The weather is perfect and completely static. There is no rain, snow or change of seasons. This

utopian world has strong guidelines and boundaries but is completely void of love. Meryl Streep plays the head elder. She feels that when people have the power to choose that they choose wrong every time.

Upon graduation, Jonas is chosen to be The Receiver and is downloaded with the old world's history and past memories. He is the only one besides Jeff Bridges, The Giver who know what love and emotions feel like. 

I highly recommend this movie for its symbolism and teaching. If humans continue on the path we are currently on, our future isn't far off what is depicted in this movie. We need to feel our emotions rather than mask them. We can't take a pill to mask our grief, sadness and pain and expect to feel joy and love fully. We have to give love to ourselves first to be open to receive love in return. 

We need to feel love, touch one another and nurture our children. We can't expect others to raise our babies and have them grow up healthy, balanced and stable. 

Jennifer Elizabeth Masters is a phenomenal healer, helping women and men find the love within so that they live extraordinary lives in joy, beauty, love and happiness. Her books are available on Amazon.com

Connect with Jennifer via private e-mail to set up your healing session or coaching. 

How Being Wishy-Washy Makes You Unhappy

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

I've never been able to plan my life. I just lurch from indecision to indecision. Alan Rickman

When we attempt to make a decision and waver we are caught in an endless loop of procrastination. We put off making a decision because we can't decide. We experience stress, guilt and even shame for not being able to choose. We are frozen in fear. Being indecisive causes procrastination and chaos.

The fear of making the wrong decision comes from unresolved emotions of the negative variety.

Perhaps one or both of your parents were domineering. You may have been prevented from making decisions on your own as a child. Insecurity is at the core of this issue. Without a strong inner authority, there is passivity. Strengthening your inner core through self-love is what is needed.  

Imagine yourself as a young child. You are forced to choose between a toy you want very much and a less expensive toy. Your dominant parent stands over you demanding, "Make a decision and do it fast!" You realize that your parent wants you to either choose no toy at all or the less expensive one. You point fearfully at the

more expensive toy. Your parent rolls their eyes and reprimands you in an aggressive tone, "There is no way I am spending that much on a toy! Forget it!" Your parent grabs your hand and drags you unwittingly out of the store without any toy at all. You are crestfallen, writhing in intense feelings of guilt, anguish, and loss.

The painful experience created by our decision causes us to fear the consequences of making a decision. Childhood wounds create a program and resistance to fear the worst case scenario.

How To Stop Toxic Parenting

Whether the above example or something similar happened to you in your childhood, the reason you can't make decisions and feel secure about your choice is due to events in your childhood. It could be you had a parent who bullied or was domineering.

Years later a strong inner critic runs the show. You are probably terrified to make a choice because it will inevitably be the wrong one causing you to feel guilty. You become frozen.

My Personal Story

My personal experience involved five dollars and a concertina at a church basement bazaar. I remember the event as clearly as it was yesterday. My mother gave me the five dollar bill which was a huge deal for me and told me I could spend it as I wished. 

We went to a church bazaar where she left me to wander around to see if there was anything I wanted. I had located a beautiful little concertina (a small squeezebox that played music). I was fascinated by this little musical instrument I cold hold in my hands. I had never had anything like it. I spent the entire time looking at it. 

In retrospect it could have been the fact that it was a noise-maker, I'm not sure. I stood talking to the man, but in fear I would make a choice that would disappoint my mother. When the time came for me to make a final decision, my mother informed me in a very domineering way, "You couldn't possibly want to spend all your money on that!" She pulled me away while my head spun around longingly at the man behind the table holding my concertina. 

Resulting Trauma Into Adulthood

This event caused me deep trauma. I was given money and told I could have whatever I wanted. When I found what I wanted, my mother then told me I couldn't have it. A looping thought was created in my brain that caused me to buy whatever I wanted as an adult.

I feel that this one event contributed to my shopping addiction later in life. When I wanted something, I just bought it to hell with the consequences, until I healed this aspect of myself. 

10 Things Happy People Do Daily

What Is The Worst That Will Happen?

Ask yourself the following questions:

1. What is the consequence I am afraid of?
2. What do I believe will happen when I make a decision?
3. What is the meaning I associate with decision-making?
4. What makes decision-making so uncomfortable for me?
5. What am I resisting or running away from?
6. What is underneath all of this?
7. What is this issue teaching you about what you want?

Whatever We Resist Persists

If we continue to resist decision-making, it will never get easier. We have to change our behavior and find a way to make decisions feel more comfortable. Clearing the childhood pattern that created this pattern will help to move you forward and alleviate the problem. Hiring a coach to help build positive self-confidence will fast forward your process. It took me over thirty years to get there on my own.

Herbert Simon coined the phrase satisficing in 1956 that prioritized a satisfactory solution over an optimal solution. When we get stuck in what is the best option, we freeze. 

Tips For Decision-Making

1. Focus positively on what you want.
2. Decide what criteria need to be met (X, Y, and Z).
3. Once the criteria are met stop researching. 
4. Less is more! More information has been scientifically proven to cause you more angst and indecision. 
5. Know that you don't have to find the optimal choice, instead, go for satisfactory. 
6. Simplify rather than complicate with too much information.
7. The more you align your energy with what you want the faster you bring it to you.
8. Even making no decision is a decision.
9. You always have a choice.
10. What feels the best for you?
11. Trust your gut. 
12. Every choice we make brings us closer to what we want.
13. You can't make a wrong decision.

If you don't choose for yourself, the universe will choose for you.

Your tough inner critic will condemn you no matter which way you turn. Quiet that inner voice by saying, "I don't have to listen to you!" Trust your gut.

The source of this issue is from feeling helpless and insecure. Focus on strengthening your confidence. Hire a love coach that gets you, and knows how to get you to HAPPY. Jennifer has been where you are and understands and intuits the root cause. Visit Jennifer's website where you can sign up for her FREE newsletter, download her FREE APP with over 7 hours of sessions, energy clearings and even a hypnotherapy session for success!

Find Jennifer's books on Amazon.com

Jennifer is currently writing her third book:
Happy Here, Happy Anywhere: The Step-By-Step Guide To Overcoming Anxiety, Depression, and Unhappiness Without A Prescription!

Jennifer is a healed healer. Certified as a Hypnotherapist with The National Guild of Hypnotherapy, An NLP Practioner and a Certified Life Coach. 

Ascension: The Keys, Symptoms and Effects To You

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

All humans on our planet are in the process of transformation. This shift is an upgrade to a higher version of our physical selves. We are moving into our luminous quality; that is at our core. Every human on this planet is becoming more heart centered, compassionate, intuitive, creative and loving, all at various speeds. These wondrous experiences are happening right now. Whether you have consciously experienced these feelings or not, you are being transformed. 

Many are becoming more consciously aware of our connection to everything that is. This article explains some of what I have experienced and am continuing to move through. Old stuff is arising for everyone. Patterns we forgot about like fear of risking it all for love, patterns and trauma from the past are bubbling up. The physical manifestations may need a doctor's care. See the list below.

The Universe supports us by bringing us what we ask for, in this uplifting of humanity. Emotions, self-esteem issues, and trauma are surfacing from the past. Theses old stuck patterns and emotions are bubbling up from the depth of your soul to be looked at, recognized and transmuted. That is where I come in. I am a key person in this new earth helping people move beyond suffering. 

The earth is also going through its upgrade and changing energetically.

Preppers are prepping for The End of Days. They will be disappointed that there will be no Armageddon or war to end all wars. Today is a new day. We are already on track for a greater and brighter future different than most can imagine. 

What Are The Effects To You?

Most people have been experiencing deep fatigue that won't go away with sleep. You may be waking up with a headache, backache or other aches and pains. The retracing of old injuries and surgeries is happening for many. You may feel the tug at the corner of an old scar that stopped hurting many years ago. 

What Can Be Done?

Do your best to get to bed early as sleep will help. Eat organic whenever you can. Drink lots of pure or filtered water (8 x 8-ounce glasses of water daily). Each morning drink a glass of water with the juice of half a lemon on an empty stomach. Lemon water will help alkalize your body. The fresh lemon juice inside the body becomes alkalizing even though lemons are highly acidic outside the body. This lemon water flushes toxins and even fats from the cells when taken daily on an empty stomach. There are many benefits to drinking lemon water first thing in the morning.

Get An Energy Clearing

When emotions and old patterns arise, it can be challenging for many people that don't have a process of moving the stuck energy. It can be a daunting task to go this alone. My work as a hypnotherapist allows you to relax and release on the other end of the phone effortlessly. Distance has no impact on energy. I have cleared and worked with people all around the world releasing while they sleep for optimum benefits. 

An energy clearing will help you move through challenges, anger, anxiety and fears that are arising. An energy clearing is painless and allows you to feel clarity, lighter, and more focused. Anxiety, fears, shame, guilt, depression, past lives, resistance, frustration, helplessness, trauma, PTSD, suicidal programs, worry, trapped emotions, and suffering are just some of the things that are released. I do work on the phone, Skype as well as remotely sending you a report with the complete details of your clearing.

Avoid overeating. Avoid too much comfort food that you know isn't beneficial for you. It is a natural desire to stuff those old feelings as they arise, with food, sweets, alcohol or even sex. Allow those feelings to surface. Feel them. Look at the pattern that is surfacing. Breathe in deeply, staying with the emotion rather than trying to stuff it back down. You may cry, you may feel the bubbling up of sadness. It can take three minutes for the energy to move through you and then it's gone. 

I have provided a list of symptoms that may occur for you. Everyone is different. I have experienced the third eye headache, dizziness, and flu-like symptoms.

1.  Headaches. Especially in the middle of the forehead. This is your third eye opening and your intuition coming in. Don't take Advil or anything for this; it is a natural state. 
2. Flu-like symptoms. Body aches can occur as your body eliminates what doesn't serve you. Detoxing can feel like you have the flu. As energy comes up to be released, it can create pain in the body. Breathe. Drink lots of water and get as much rest as you can.
3. Dizziness. Dizziness can be like an energetic somersault spinning forward. Dizziness can be a download of Divine energy. 
4. Nausea. Not a wonderful feeling ever. Energy shifting in your body can bring up nausea.
5. Ear wax is moving and clicking. The movement of ear wax is for your benefit. You will begin to hear your intuition. Ear candling is the least invasive way to clean out ear wax. Excess yeast can build up in the ears caused by eating too much sugar.
6. Vaginal infections. Surprising as it may seem many women have been experiencing vaginal infections and yeast infections as old energy is being retraced and eradicated. Treat these infections as you would normally. 
7. Greater abundance with less struggle.  
8. More harmony in your relationships. Part of this new paradigm is to heal all old relationships. Resolution is occurring where there had been none before.
9. Doing a job and work, you love. Those who are light workers are becoming coaches, certified in different modalities. 
10. Increased joy and bliss. Simple things can bring great joy and happiness. Walking through a field of flowers, seeing a newborn baby all can bring you to tears or intense feelings of joy.
11. Vulnerability. You may find yourself able to be more vulnerable with complete strangers and certainly loved ones. Higher consciousness will allow you to open your heart more easily.
12. Inability to lie. With higher consciousness there is a greater sense of responsibility for telling the truth. You may begin to course-correct mid-sentence to ensure you tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth.
13. Animals love you more. Animals are becoming more attentive and loving as we do the same. You may find your animals become increasingly affectionate on a daily basis.
14. You are authentic. Rather than wearing a mask or hiding behind half-baked personas, you are standing in your truth and being who you truly are. No more faking orgasms either. 
15. Relationships. If you have been codependent in the past you recognize that you can take care of your needs, attract a companion and relationship that is loving and balanced. You love, admire, respect and adore your partner.
16. You Realize Your Dreams effortlessly. 
17. You are drama free. Emotions are not holding you, hostage, any longer.
18. You have an inner knowing. 
19. You live in a state of allowing rather than trying to make things happen.
20. You have a deep sense of TRUST of The Universe and that everything will be okay. The support and orchestration of The Universe is evident daily.
21. You recognize your connection with the earth and all beings.
22. You stopped being concerned about what others think. 
23. There is no right or wrong. You have stopped thinking of yourself as a failure and recognize that there is no right or wrong.
24. You recognize that we are all One. Each person represents an out-picturing of our inner selves. (Although we still look at others and say, "What were they thinking!?"

Practice Self-Love

Loving the self is the key to all healing. I have been called The Self Love Guru because the focus on my work is self-love. Everything comes from a lack of self-love - even depression and addiction. When we love ourselves unconditionally, our health, relationships, and life shifts in powerful ways. Instead of focusing on problems we begin to see the gifts and lessons along the way. We see signs that guide us rather than feeling that we are unsupported. Instead of fear we begin to strengthen our faith. Rather than living in fear, we are empowered and joyful. I highly recommend everyone take my Love Yourself Fearlessly six week course, my signature program. In one session, people are changed. In three, they begin to see changes in their lives.

To contact Jennifer Elizabeth Masters e-mail here for your FREE Discovery conversation of twenty to forty minutes. Or visit her website and sign up for her newsletter here.

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Jennifer Elizabeth Masters is a sex and passion coach helping women express their highest potential in work, love and play. If your life, love or world isn't what you want it to be, contact Jennifer now! For information about her premium programs like Orgasm For Life Boot Camp for the mind-body and spirit, e-mail her here for a free Discovery Session.

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Are You Sex Starved In Your Relationship?

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

Excerpt from Orgasm For Life get your copy and keep your sex hot and the arguments fair.

Married With Children

Commitment, honesty, and trust are what is required for deep intimacy. Sex is what lubricates a healthy relationship, keeping it young, alive, firing on all cylinders. Sex is a reward for many men, but often it is all too rare and fleeting. Most women in their 30’s, with children, have sex once a week or less with their husbands. 

For men at this age, not having sex three times a week or more can feel like placing a four-course meal in front of a starving person and telling them they can’t eat it. Laying next to your beautiful wife night after night, not being able to touch her is torture. 

Women can throw themselves into raising children while having their tactile needs met during the day. When their husband comes home, sex is usually a very low priority. Sleep may be the only thing on a young mother’s mind after a day of breastfeeding chasing and raising children. Yet, to keep the marriage alive it needs to be a priority. 

Regular date-nights each week give a young couple the opportunity to get out without the children. Having grandparents watch the children at their home, can give new parents an opportunity to have sex without interruptions. A locking bedroom door is imperative for parents with small children. Keeping children out of the marital bed, also helps to keep passion alive. Making love with an infant in your bed is not healthy for any of you.

Private time for a couple is important for keeping a relationship balanced, healthy, connected and growth oriented. At the same time spontaneity is necessary to keep the passion alive. When all your sexual encounters are planned, pressure to perform can cause issues and stress. Sex is supposed to be a fun, pleasurable experience, rather than feel like work. Having to become passionate on a clock or calendar certainly eliminates spontaneity.

Believe me, being a single mother is not glamourous. It can be one of the most challenging times in your life. Keeping your marriage alive and healthy is best for everyone. Children need two parents to be confident, effective, balanced adults. Making sex a priority means that you are making your husband a priority. He is needed as a parent and partner. Don’t ignore him. For you men, just because your wife is a little more round than usual, make sure she knows you still are attracted to her. Women give a lot up to have babies. Men need to be understanding of their wive’s needs as well. 

After giving birth, pregnancy can be the very last thing a woman wants. The fear of pregnancy can keep her from wanting to have sex. Use protection, to help dispel these natural fears. Be respectful of one another’s feelings. Remember how much you loved each other before the pregnancy. That love is still present, under the diapers, laundry and new obligations.

Surprising as it may seem, men and women often want the same basic things. Go to any Internet dating site to read the profiles. Men want a partner to share their experiences with, the same as women do. Each one of us wants to love and be loved. We all want to be accepted for who we are. Most of us want to have our physical needs taken care of. We want our sexual exchanges to be exciting, fulfilling and beautiful. We want our partners to care for us and adore us, attracted to our physical bodies. Most want to have passionate sexual exchanges that include orgasms. We also want to be loved, appreciated and respected for who we are.

Being Right And Losing The Relationship War

Where we can get mis-directed is when we think of the opposite sex as the enemy. Relationships do not have to feel like war. Blaming our partners for how we feel is ego-based, codependent behavior. It is not productive while putting us in the position of

victim. None of us are victims. (I have flogged that dead horse in my first book, Odyssey Victim to Victory.) This is my own story of recovery from childhood molestation. Odyssey holds keys to loving yourself and become a fully functional independent, sexual being. 

No one wants to be made wrong. Our egos get in the way, with finger pointing. When we are told we are wrong, we can shut down emotionally. We cannot listen fully. We stop being able to hear what other person is saying without being reactive. The issue with wanting to be right causes us to be so focused on being right, that we miss the truth, the good stuff - the loving. We make our partner angry. We make our partner wrong. Our egos become activated and we run away from connection, closeness and intimacy. 

Instead of pointing fingers at the other person, it is more productive to look at why you feel the way you do? Usually our reaction to what the other person has said has nothing to do with why we are angry. We are often triggered by our partner. Which is to say, we

Pointing fingers never solves anything

are reacting to an old wound or button placed within us by a family member, usually a parent, relative, teacher or close friend. Often the screaming is loudest when we pick at the scab of old wounds. It is our old wounds that need to be healed to be able to move on from the past, rather than being stuck in our stories. We can become so focused on what happened in the past that we feel our current partner is also doing the same thing to us. 

Our patterns resurface like an old broken record that repeats the same refrain until someone pushes us beyond where we have gone before. Which is why I so love the healing aspects of working with hypnotherapy and energy healing. I see my coaching clients move beyond their stuckness, with control and ridigity into fluidity and forward movement. Their fears fall away while ease, trust with happiness build. Using a hypnotherapy process to release the trigger mechanism, I have witnessed clients move beyond their fears, embracing the love and the beauty within.

Issues with challenges in life will always arise. Using words like “never,” “always” and “should” create issues. Jonathan Robinson, author of Communication Miracles for Couples: Easy and Effective Tools to Create More Love and Less Conflict, uses a wonderful, easy way to help couples resolve conflict effortlessly.
Robinson says we each have a self esteem bank account. The lower our self esteem is, the less we can take critiscm or finger pointing. We need to feel acknowledged, appreciated as well as accepted by our partners. 

I agree with this concept having come from a place of low self-esteem as a child. When my husband criticised me for something I was doing, it sounded like my parents were speaking to me. I went back emotionally to my memory bank, to the place of not feeling acknowledged and accepted as a child. Our minds are so powerful. The tapes re-wind in a milisecond. Instantly we are like a little child, rather than a mature adult. Going back to the place of our innerchild often happens with couples. It is not what is occurring in the moment that has them upset. It is the connecting of the dots from this moment to a point in time that was painful. 

When we argue, often it is two children who have been wounded that show up rather than the adults that we are. Two little wounded children cannot resolve anything. They tend to pick up their toys and run away. This is a trigger mechanism. Until the trigger is cleared, this process will continue. This is one of my areas of

expertise. My own experience of being reactive with volatility in relationships has made me an expert on uncovering these triggers for my clients. De-sensitizing them to the point that the trigger is no longer present, within one session - no more trigger!

Robinson’s recommendation is to acknowledge how the other person is feeling first. Most of us that have been through therapy know about this tactic. However, his process goes on to create better communication with your partner. Acknowledging how they feel is not the same as agreeing with them. Once you acknowledge how they feel, they can hear you better. They feel validated, knowing you truly care.

Accept the other person’s version of reality. This does not mean you agree. For example, Jane tells her husband, “I see how you feel blamed by me. “ I’m very sorry you felt that way.” Next, Robinson suggests that you tell your partner something that you appreciate about them when you are not angry with them. “You are really important to me, and I love the way you work so hard to take care of our family.” Giving your partner something that you appreciate about them, allows them to let their guard down to feel less defensive.

The first thing that Robinson says we need to do when things get heated, is to acknowledge the other person’s experience. For example, as David is cleaning up the kitchen after dinner, his wife, Judith suggests, “Why don’t you use this scrub brush instead of the sponge.” David reacts, “Why do you have to nag at me whenever I try to help you?” His wife, Judith might retort, “I am not nagging at you, you just wash dishes like a two-year old and you need some help.” Her off-hand, seemingly innocuous response might create a huge argument. 

David might think to himself, “She can kiss my white ass! I’ll never freaking help her prissy little butt ever again!” David’s little inner boy is showing up, because he feels wounded. Lower levels of self-esteem make us more reactive and argumentative. Accurate, intelligent communication is a delicate art. It is the key to keeping a relationship balanced and communications open. 

When we are highly reactive, it throws up ego-barriers destroying closeness, open-heartedness, love and joy. Our little inner child (ego) is quick to judge or attack which shuts us down. What I believe Robinson is trying to show with this example is; how our egos can distort our communication, love-making and sexual functions.

If Judith had used Robinson’s formula for communication, she might have said, “I hear you saying that I treat you like you’re a child when you are doing household tasks. I am sorry that you feel I am putting you down.” After being acknowledged, then validated, Judith’s husband may relax feeling heard and understood. Judith would then let David know how much she appreciates her husband for helping her out, while lifting some of the burden from her.
Robinson reminds us, you don’t have to agree with the way your partner is feeling. 

Remember, each of you is having your own experience. Three people can watch the same scene in a movie, then interpret a totally different experience. We all have filters which change the reality we experience. These filters are created by our egos. 

Acknowledgement, says Robinson, creates trust. I believe, that the trust issues that Robinson speaks of is one of the most important issues in sexual functionality. The more you validate your partner’s experience the more you build trust.

As an example, of how experience effects judgment; I was traumatized sexually by men, as a young girl.  As an adult I made men wrong, because of what men did to me when I was little. I was tainted by my childhood experience. This experience created a lens that all men were bad and only wanted sex from me. I confused sex with love mis-judging my male partners. Men would say things to me, which I would take out of context. This created mis-communication and served to put a damper on our sexual activities. The key to having good sex and gangbuster orgasms is to see things clearly, rather than through our filters or egos.

Acknowledging that your partner is really having the experience they are, even if you don’t agree with them allows them to feel heard. It also enhances communication and understanding. Understanding is one of the biggest issues within our relationships. We sometimes think very differently. We often come from various backgrounds. Our issues and trigger mechanisms can be totally unrelated. Each of us is having our own individual experience of the same thing. It does not mean that your perception is wrong. Accurate perceptions however, bring each of us nearer to the truth, regardless of our individual perceptual bias.

Having conflict resolved immediately keeps the air clear. Replying, “I’m fine!” When we are not, keeps us tied up in illusion and separation. We make up stories in our heads based on our past, which have little bearing on realtiy. This process should be avoided if you want good sex and great orgasms. The fragility of the human psyche guarantees that conflict will occur as our egos clash between male and female in the sexual act. It is also the point at which we can have the deepest connection.

Aphrodite Effect is all about the effect of LOVE on all that we do. Venus was the Greek Goddess of love. She was an ageless beauty, powerful, strong, respected, sexual and knew who she was. She loved herself

fearlessly. Love gives us power, ageless beauty, and deep connection. Set up your FREE discovery session with me here. JenniferElizabethMasters@gmail.com

Find my books on Amazon to get you moving in a positive direction.

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Why Wounded People Hurt Others

Monday, December 9, 2013

When we are hurting, we can be mean-spirited, resentful and reactive. I can speak to this issue because that was me. When my husband attempted to caress, hug or get close, I pushed him away. I couldn't receive love because I was empty. I didn't love me. (This article was dragged out of my archives because it is so important for everyone to understand. "Is your love like the desert?") 

Does your love remind you of the desert?

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

Mojave desert, where I live currently

Sharp comments, prickly personality?

I was recently walking with my dog, Karma along the dry, dusty trail into the mountains just north of my home. I was thinking about the way I used to be in my relationships. Reactive, bitchy prickly, dry, no sense of humor and hot and angry to the touch when someone pointed out my faults. I used to hurt anyone who tried to get close to me because I was hurting.

We can be touchy and reactive when we hold onto our emotions. We cry, for example, to relieve stress and pressure that builds inside us from break-ups, challenging life events, grief, sadness and upset. When our emotions get stuffed inside of us, we become reactive. We cannot take the slightest recommendation or suggestion without being reactive - like the desert.

We have prickly plants and trees here, like the Joshua tree for example. Joshua trees only grow in the Mojave Desert (pronounced Mohave).  If you leaned against one of these babies, you could be seriously hurt. I liken the Joshua trees to us when we lash out at someone when they correct us or suggest another way. 

Having to be right all the time can cause you to lose friends and lovers. This need comes from your ego. When your ego runs the show, you will not fare well in relationships.  

T. Harve Ecker, of the Millionaire Mind fame, used to say, would you rather be right, or would you rather be rich? I say, would you rather be right, or would you rather be loved? Being right can make you a very lonely person. You become very prickly, and people don't want to lean up against you, or be with you. Bitchy, prickly, same thing. 

Even the weeds in the desert have thorns on them. The thorns fall off to procreate the plant so that it doesn't die out. These sharp seeds are called goat's heads. We get them on our feet when we walk around barefoot. 

When we are touchy and reactive, we are coming from our ego and our pain. We close our hearts. We disconnect from our true selves. We can be very lonely in this place of being a victim, feeling that everyone is out to get us, or hurt us. It is simply not true. It just appears that way to us, because all we can see is the pain.

When we are hurt and don't heal from it, we carry this pain into everything we do. Pain is what colors our world. It is all the same, everywhere we turn, like the desert. As far as the eye can see, it is colorless, empty, remote. Just like us. 

The wind picks up here, causing change, turbulence, dust storms and vortexes of sand in the updrafts. You can't see when the dust and sand are flying in the air. It blurs our vision. Just as our pain blurs our vision. When we hang onto our pain it defines us it isn't true; we just think it is. . The pain becomes who we are. The emotional pain creates physical pain. 

There is the beauty here, but it is often fleeting, disguised or hidden. Many see only the ugliness or the sparseness of vegetation. The more beautiful one feels about themselves, the more beauty you see outside of you. When we are bitchy, reactive and thorny, we make it difficult for others to see our beauty. We disguise our softness under our suffering and pain. As things begin to change, we often hang on, to the past, not wanting to move forward. We act out of fear of the unknown. Our resistance to change causes us to suffer even more. What we don't recognize in our pain is that we don't have to suffer, all we have to do is let go, forgive and move forward into the wind. 

When our suffering overwhelms us which is when many begin to recognize we need to change, this is the driving force to heal. Pain is the catalyst for healing. Inner work can take decades when doing it on your own. It took me over thirty years to recover and find my true self. That is where I come in. Aren't you ready to let go of your pain and suffering? My pain used to define me. I used to describe myself as a SURVIVOR! Now I describe myself as an Adventurer, a lover of life, an ambassador of light. I prefer the latter. Wishing you a joyful, day moving forward into the wind. When you do, the wind will be at your back instead of in your face.

Are Bladder Infections A Problem? 5 Simple Cures To Use Today

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

Bladder infections often occur following sexual activity for women.  An infection of the kidney, ureter, bladder, kidney or urethra is known as a UTI (urinary tract infection). 

A UTI occurs when bacteria enters the urethra and travels into the kidney or bladder and multiplies. When bacteria multiplies in the bladder there may be a feeling of anxiety and burning urge to void or pee. This urge and burning will increase within hours. Empty the bladder often. It can become very uncomfortable when left untreated. A bladder infection may wake you in the night. 

What Are The Signs Of A Bladder Infection?

1. An urgent need to urinate.
2. A feeling of anxiety and burning upon urination. 
3. Urination that disrupts sleep.
4. Cloudy or blood tinged urine.
5. Fever in children and elderly.
6. Heaviness and achy bladder.

There are several reasons why you might be getting bladder infections after sex. The last one might surprise you. You might think you can get a bladder infection from your partner, you can't. You can get a bladder infection from having sex, but not from being infected by a partner. 

Why Did I Get This? 

1. Urinate right after sex! The act of sex opens up the urethra and can plunge bacteria into the bladder. After eight hours of sleep the bladder can be filled with bacteria that leads to infection. To be safe, rather than falling asleep after sex, always empty your bladder (pee) so that the bacteria doesn't build up. Drink extra water after sex to flush out bacteria.
2. Avoid Cross-Contamination. Physiologically speaking, the candy jar (vagina) is very close to our point of elimination or rectum. If you and your partner engage in rectal stimulation, E. coli can easily enter the vagina if the same finger or penis is also used in the vagina. Shower before engaging in sex. If a shower isn't on your agenda, wash immediately to avoid bacterial contamination before inserting a finger or penis back into the vagina, or touching the clitoris.
3. Just a slip of the tip! Even if you don't engage in rectal sex or stimulation. As stimulation occurs and penetration follows the penis can accidentally slide into the rectum and then back into the vagina. A slip of the tip can be all it takes to infect the bladder with E. coli. Have a soapy wash cloth handy to wash and rinse off before reinserting the penis into the vagina.
4. Anger might be the reason! If you are with the wrong person, you might find you get a bladder infection even if none of the above occur. Anger towards your partner could be the reason you are getting a bladder infection you might be "pissed off". 
5. Sexual trauma or molestation causes repressed anger towards your molester or perpetrator. You may not even be aware of it, which is how it happened for me. I had so many bladder infections that I required bladder neck surgery at the age of 21 to remove scar tissue. The issues of molestation lie dormant under the surface and never go away. If you have never told a soul, these secrets eat away at your soul. They need to come out and be healed. This pain, sorrow, humiliation, guilt, and shame needs to be cleared. This is the deep integrated work that I did for myself and now help others with. You don't have to relive the memory to heal it. Until I healed my past and forgave everyone, I continued to get bladder infections.

Men can get bladder infections from E. coli and/or blockages in the urethra. 

An Ounce of Prevention

Drink plenty of water. Begin your day with the juice of half a lemon in a 16-ounce glass of water to alkalize your body. If you have a bladder infection drink one eight ounce glass of water every hour. Avoid sugar and spicy foods, sugar increases the opportunity for bacteria to multiply and spicy foods can cause firey urine that increases the burning sensation.

Vitamin C taken daily can reduce occurrences and also be a cure when taken in high doses between 1,000 mg and 2,000 mg a day.

Uva Ursi Arctostaphylos uva-ursi is a plant species of the genus Arctostaphylos (manzanita). The leaves of this small shrub have been used by Native Americans for centuries as a mild diuretic, astringent and in the treatment of kidney and bladder infections for cystitis, urethritis, nephritis and pyelitis and in pyelonephritis. Uva Ursi helps to reduce uric acid as well as relieving the pain of kidney stones. It is helpful in the treatment of chronic diarrhea, as a muscle relaxant. Uva ursi soothes, strengthens, tightens irritated and inflamed tissues. 

AZO is a product you can find in any drug store like Rite Aid, WalGreen's or even Walmart. It is a fantastic aid for eliminating the pain and burning that occurs with a bladder infection. Please note, it does not eliminate the bacteria that causes a bladder infection, just the pain, and irritation. It will turn your urine orange. Don't be alarmed. Cost approximately $8.00 per package of 30 tablets.

Pineapple contains large amounts of Bromelain. Bromelain helps reduce inflammation and helps to heal bladder infections because of this enzyme.

Baking Soda and Water is a remedy many have taken and become poisoned. Use caution when drinking baking soda and water. Large amounts of this stuff can lead to a hospital visit or worse. 

Drink between 5  and eight x eight-ounce glasses of water a day. Most people are dehydrated, especially when consuming sodas or caffeinated beverages. It is possible to drink too much water however, gallons of water or too much at one time, isn't healthy either. Remember everything in moderation.

Avoid alcohol, carbonated drinks, artificial sweeteners, sugar and spicy foods while healing a UTI. All of the aforementioned will intensify the burning and discomfort. Engaging in sex with a bladder infection is not recommended. The bladder is ultra sensitive while inflamed and sex may be quite painful during this time.

Cranberry juice is no longer recommended to reduce or treat bladder infections. Several studies showed no reduction in incidence of infection in women who drank cranberry juice or took capsules. I don't recommend juices with sugar added, as sugar increases acidity and will cause bacteria and yeast (candida) to flourish.

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