Friday, October 17, 2014

I'd Love You, If You Were Different

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

How often do we hear or think, "If only you were different, I could really love you?" Maybe you have children and your new partner does not want them. Perhaps you don't look the way your partner perceives their ideal mate should look. Or maybe it is something else.


It seems that most men have anger issues that they have not deal with. Some are controlling, or even jealous. Perhaps they put you down, or have addictions. What about the sneaking feeling that he is not telling the complete truth?

Women can be controlling, bitchy and outright confusing. Both sexes have our own share of issues. We are humans, and we are all works in progress. When we look at someone and point out their issues in our minds, what we are also doing is focusing on them instead of us. When we don't have addictions, anger issues and control issues, we will attract someone who also has healed their issues as well. As long as we have work to do on ourselves, we will continue to attract partners who will illustrate to us what work we do have to do. For example, if you have been co-dependent, you may continue to attract people who are alcoholics or addicts. Until we really are free of our co-dependence, our vibration continually attracts those who will help us heal OUR ISSUES. Loving ourselves unconditionally through the process is what we need to do. 



It is so much easier to look at someone else and say, "They are emotionally unavailable." If you have attracted someone who is not available emotionally then neither are you. It's okay. Not all issues have an equal match that is immediately evident. Sometimes women have a fear of anger, then attract a man who rages and/or yells. We need to overcome our fears. Self advocating, rather than shrinking away is what is needed. Stepping forward and addressing what is bothering us is key. Often we keep quiet for fear of retaliation. When we don't speak up about what is upsetting us, the issue will continue. When we don't have the issue, we will no longer attract this kind of partner.

What We Are Saying To Ourselves

When we look at another person and point a finger, we are focusing outside of ourselves, when the focus needs to be on ourselves. What is the source of this attraction? Do I have a similar match? Looking at your partner and saying, "You are the one with the problem!" is acting in denial. 

Side-Stepping A Problem

When we begin to recognize that we are the one with the insecurity, or the fear that needs healing, we need help. It is difficult to clear anxiety on your own. I did it, but it took me almost 30 years to do it on my own. One of the biggest issues that both men and women
have is not addressing a problem when it arises. We tend to keep quiet so that we don't rock the boat. If your boat is unstable, I have news for you: it is already rocking! Speak up. Talk about the issues AS THEY COME UP. Don't keep setting problems aside, as they will build a mountain of resentment that will be difficult to overcome. Ask questions. Don't be afraid. 

How To Speak Up Without Blame


  1. Use "I" statements. For example, "When you call me a piece of do-do, I FEEL bad. I would prefer it if you treated me with respect, caring and love."
  2. If someone does not accept you the way you are, tell them so. "It feels to me that you want me to change. Unconditional love, accepts me as I am. Do you not love me as I am?" No one is perfect, not even your partner. Acceptance is key. If they don't accept you, move on. 
  3. If your partner is not accepting you now, they never will. Non-acceptance speaks volumes about the person that you are with. Wouldn't you rather be with someone who does accept you? Ask yourself this question, "Do I accept myself, the way I am?"
Jennifer Elizabeth Masters is the author of Orgasm For Life. This fabulous high energy book will help you look at yourself AND your partner compassionately. It will help you bring back
the passion, create new ways of making love and help you understand what you both need. Jennifer works privately with people committed to heal, grow and evolve. If you have anxiety, depression, addictions, or are unhappy with your life, you have come to the right place. Jennifer has been where you are. She suffered from co-dependence, depression, anxiety, health issues and insomnia for over 30 years. She worked diligently on herself, developing in the process a plan that works. Healing and change does not happen over night. Jennifer is a cheerleader, guide, and Intuitive catalyst. Her work is transformative. If you have not done it on your own, call Jennifer now. She is available for a one-time session to see if her work is a good fit for you. (770) 480-5500. 

If you would prefer, send her an e-mail now: JenniferElizabethMasters@gmail.com   Or visit her website: http://www.JenniferElizabethMasters.com

Thursday, October 16, 2014

3 Powerful Reasons To Shake Your Booty For Health

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

If I had not experienced the powerful benefits of shaking it, I would not have believed it! Writing, teaching and coaching women and men about sex, I consider myself quite open-minded. However, the twerking, shaking and focus on women's butts left me cold, until two weeks ago. Remember the old phrase "Try it, you'll like it?" It is true. As humans, we often judge others before we reach understanding. When we sit in judgment, we can't see what is before us. We simply close our minds and hearts. I propose that you open your mind, and your heart and try it for yourself.


Why Zumba?

Zumba is a worldwide branded fitness trend consisting of Latin-inspired music, hip hop with exercise and choreography. Alberto Perez, better known as "Beto" is the founder of Zumba, hailing from Miami and begun in 2002. The choreography draws from cumbia, salsa, merengue, bachata and reggae, fusing them together with cardio aerobics. 

The hip and booty shaking awakens the kundalini and sexual centers for both men AND women. Predominantly attended by women, not only does it help you become more fit, increase cardio-vascular health, lose weight and lose inches it also can awaken the sleepwalking women who have not had sex in years.

Uptight and Self Conscious?

I was raised in a very stiff upper lipped family. My father's parents were British. My mother was raised by her grandmother right off the boat from The Ukraine. We didn't shake anything in my household and certainly didn't watch or talk about anyone who did. In fact, when Elvis was on television, we didn't watch him, because my mother found him vulgar. 


I was not allowed to wear short skirts at home, and certainly was not allowed to reveal cleavage, nor did my mother. These old ingrained patterns can be hard to break. If you want to live a long healthy life and have fun doing it, loosening up is definitely to our advantage. Breaking free of patterns and social regulations can be immensely freeing. Letting go of what others think of us, is key to enjoying an abundant, wealthy, happy and fulfilling life.


1.Benefit: Smiling From Ear To Ear. JOY!

Once you let go of trying to be perfect on the dance floor, you relax and fall into step, maybe not always on the same foot as the instructor, but in time to the music. After getting your feet in step your confidence is raised your arms begin to work better when your feet know what they are doing. The next step is falling into joy. Pure unadulterated joy. The last class I did I smiled from beginning to end. 

2. You Become Healthier

The women I interviewed that have been doing Zumba told me that Zumba classes did the following:

  • Helped one woman heal from back surgery
  • Helped one woman tone her body and lose 30 inches all over (she is 49) in one year
  • Helped countless women get and stay fit because it is so much fun, it keeps them coming back for more
  • Helped one young woman heal depression
  • Freed one woman to become multi-orgasmic
  • Brought joy to thousands who previously were depressed
  • Awakened the sexual center in all ages of women


3. Shaking Your Booty Awakens Your Sexual Center


No matter how long it has been since you have had sex, the moves in Zumba get your pelvic region moving. When your pelvis moves, so does your sexual energy. Sexual energy and emotions can become stuck. When sexual energy gets stuck, you can become bitchy, closed-minded and controlling. Sound like anyone you know? Moving the pelvis has the added benefit of opening up your sacral chakra as well as your root chakra, which allows your creativity to flow as well as sexuality. The root chakra is located in the perineum (between the anus and vagina in women, and anus and base of the scrotum in men).


There is an added bonus of awakening and opening your sexual energy center: you become more confident and step into the being that you truly are. Women often feel more Goddess energy once they begin moving their sexual energy fully. Orgasms can be easier to achieve, or more powerful. 

Why Do You Want Your Sexual Energy Awakened?


Having blocked energy is not good for anyone. When there is a blockage, illness can occur. When you have blocked sexual energy you can also have issues with finances and security. Living a balanced life involves having our sexual center opened. Zumba is a fun way to open your sexual center and empower your Goddess self. 

My Zumba Teacher - Lucy Harris

I love my Zumba instructor. She is fit, sexy, fun and energetic. Moreover she has got some moves on her that would make 

Beyoncé jealous. Lucy who began dancing at age 4, took 4 - 6 classes a week till her later high school years. She then gave dance a break and played basketball. Lucy's mother, Kathy Hart supported her then by paying for and taking Lucy to all  her dance classes.

She continues to attend her classes, often taking over for Lucy, and well able to hold her own in moves and endurance. Kathy is fit and youthful. Clearly Zumba has kept her body in great shape. I have yet to see anyone who regularly attends Zumba classes look dour or miserable. Zumba brings back the HAPPY! When we are happy we thrive. Everyone I have talked to about their experience with Zumba has said that feeling happier is the number one benefit.


Jennifer Elizabeth Masters is the author of Orgasm For Life, The Sex Bible for the New Age. She is an empowerment coach for women. Her website is JenniferElizabethMasters.com

Saturday, October 4, 2014

Ways To Use Mercury Retrograde To Your Advantage

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

Whether you study astrology or not, at one time or another the effects of the full moon, sun and the stars have been felt by each of us. The planets exert a unique influence on us in the way we think, feel and communicate. Major changes in our planetary system also are felt by us. 

Just for kicks and giggles, keep notes on all the missed calls, communication break-downs, break-ups, broken contracts, travel issues, lost luggage, computer, cell phone issues during the next three weeks. 


What Does The Planet Mercury Do?

Mercury rules commerce, communication, intelligence, mind, memory, talking, texting, travel, communication devices such as cell phones, texting, computers, Internet.  Arguments and misunderstandings can occur during a Mercury Retrograde more than any other time of the year.

Although I am not an astrologer, I have followed the effects of the planets all the way from my birth to now. Mercury Retrograde is one event which happens three times each year, creating chaos, broken contracts, delayed and cancelled flights. I have even seen haircuts done during the retrograde cause great distress. It is not a time to begin anything new, sign on the dotted line, purchase a cell phone, computer or anything to do with communication. Verbal and texted communication could even be wrought with misunderstandings. 

Looking For Love?

Just prior to the last retrograde period I helped a woman manifest her soul mate. She met him during Mercury Retrograde. She was sure he was the ONE! As soon as the retrograde period ended, so did her feelings for this man, as she recognized his emotional unavailability and inability to commit. A Mercury Retrograde is NOT, I repeat NOT THE TIME to find a mate. By the end of the retrograde situations and character will come to light that will change your mind or their's.

Read on and find out what benefits a Mercury Retrograde brings.

My Personal Experience 

Over the years I have experienced many retrograde periods. At first, I did not take my astrologer, Sherry Henderson, of Oracle 20-20 fame seriously. Eventually, I saw how writing any kind of contract, travel, marriages, meetings, haircuts, business deals could turn sour during retrograde periods. 

Hairy Trip To India Affected By A Retrograde

I traveled to India for the first time, during a Mercury Retrograde. My first flight to Chicago to connect with my flight to India was cancelled. I had to run through the Atlanta airport to hop on a very full flight. I got the LAST seat on the plane. Had I not run, I would not have gotten to India. My luggage was lost on the same trip. I arrived in India, a foreign land without underwear, makeup, a change of clothes or any of my personal belongings. 

House Sales Affected By Mercury Retrograde

My ex-husband Rich Resuta was a home-builder. During our marriage I witnessed contract after contract signed during a Mercury Retrograde fall apart, turn sour or drag on and on without closing. Over the 12 years we were together, I witnessed this over 30 times. Sometimes, you have to do what you have to do, sign on the dotted line and hope for the best. Yet, each and every contract signed during a retrograde period created havoc, distress, loss and major issues. You can learn the hard way, or take my advice and read carefully. Even a marriage or engagement during a Mercury Retrograde could have devastating results. 

My weekly newsletter went out to my clients yesterday. I mentioned the coming retrograde over a week ago. Several people have already reported two house sales, missed flights and delays in contract signing. 

The Shadow Point

In my own life, I will not begin a new radio show, a webinar, a book signing or anything else during this time. Even the shadow point which occurs 7 days prior to the beginning of this retrograde, which is October 4th, can be felt up to two weeks or even more before the retrograde begins. There is also a shadow point at the end of the retrograde of 7 days.

What is A Retrograde?

A retrograde is a period of time during which a planet can appear to be turning backwards. A retrograde can be three weeks, 3 months or even 10 years or more in someone's chart. During this time, all the benefits that a planet provides are taken away. If a planet rules communication, like Mercury does, all things relating to communication, contracts of any kind, including marriages, travel, communication devices, like computers, cell phones planes, trains, automobiles are affected - negatively. 

Why Should I Care?

Life can be challenging. Astrology can help you navigate your life effortlessly and help you avoid beginning businesses, relationships, contracts, travel, moves, starting a new job, dating, marrying etc. during difficult periods. My middle son, David married during a Venus (the planet of love) Retrograde - which means there was no love on the day they married. Their marriage ended with his wife being unfaithful within 3 years of their wedding. They were very much in love when they got married. David wedded the love of his life.

Venus Retrograde

I was born during a Venus AND Mercury Retrograde. I have spent almost my entire year working through issues of love and communication challenges. Now I teach love, self love and self esteem, because I learned - finally how to love myself. Did my birth time and date influence my life? You betcha! Many people are born with great challenges astrologically, while others have few. 

Who Uses Astrology?

The Mayans, Aztecs, Egyptians, Celtics, Druids, movie stars, presidents and royalty have used professional astrologists and have done for thousands of years to predict the best outcome of a given situation. The best date to build the pyramids, inaugurations, weddings, and meetings were among some of the reasons astrologists were hired. Nancy Reagan and Ronald used an astrologer for the entire term of President Reagan's presidency.

Your Chart and Personal Destiny

I recommend getting your chart done by a professional. One such person I recommend is Cheney Hall. Cheney was trained by Lynn Hammond Gray. She is known as one of the all time greats in Astrology. Over the years I have had charts done by 6 different astrologers. You need to have a consult with him to get all the high points and low points explained, unless you can read an astrological chart. I can say without a doubt that Cheney's were the best and most detailed.


Cheney and I have been friends for several years and met when I lived in Atlanta, Georgia. He did a full set of charts for me, with transits (how the planets move through your chart) and a consultation.  Cheney's delivery was the most comprehensive I have ever had. In the full consultation, you get the long explanation of what the planets were doing and how they would affect all aspects of your life, love, success, wealth. He does charts for people with great detail and explanations. Don't try to cut corners and omit the explanation - you need it, unless you are an Astrologer. He is excellent.  I highly recommend him. You can read his blog here: www.CHIRON2000.blogspot.com

Cheney always over delivers and is very insightful with his recommendations. He was the one I consulted before moving to California. Cheney Hall's information proved invaluable to me. He said I would be more financially stable and make more money in California. He was correct. He can do charts to detail moves, suggested places to move to (Cartology), as well as progressed charts. Don't quote me on all this, as I am not an astrologer. He will be able to tell you what works best for your situation. You can e-mail Cheney here to set up your appointment, or ask him questions about pricing etc. Here is Cheney's e-mail for contact. Tell him his cooky friend Jennifer sent you.


What To Do During A Mercury Retrograde


  1. Re-write your book.
  2. Re-organize your closet, home, car, business.
  3. Re-think anything.
  4. Re-work a project.
  5. Re-do your taxes.
  6. Re-group
  7. Re-think anything.
  8. Re-view your life, your relationship, your business successes.
  9. Re-new your fruit trees with pruning. 
  10. Re-visit family and friends. 
Ways To Navigate The Retrograde Period

  1. Make sure your communications are clear to avoid conflict.
  2. Use care while driving. Accidents happen more frequently during Mercury Retrograde because people are not thinking or in a hurry. 
  3. Avoid Arguments and fighting.
  4. Delay the purchase of boats, bikes, cars, trucks, or airplanes.
  5. Do not purchase a cell phone or computer.
  6. Do not take communications devices in for work.
  7. Delay taking your car in to the mechanic.
  8. Wait to begin a new project.
  9. Delay signing up for a dating site, or meeting a new person.
  10. Avoid travel if you can. Flights can be cancelled, or missed, and luggage can be lost.




Jennifer is an author of Orgasm For Life, she is a life, love and relationship coach. She helps you find the love inside of you, to live a fulfilled, happy and wealthy life on all levels. She has helped countless people find love through her coaching. 

Self love is the foundation for a happy life. Anxiety, depression, confusion, chaos, drama, low self esteem, illness are all things she healed in her own life when she began to love herself completely. Jennifer walks the walk and talks the talk. She lives the life that she helps you open to. Jennifer is unique in many ways. She became enlightened in 2012. She reads the Akashic Records, is an Intuitive, Mystic and is a certified hypnotherapist with The National Guild of Hypnotists, A certified life coach with and is a Master Energy Healer. She sees and senses energy. She has healed her own fears, anxiety, worry and negativity. She is a master at knowing what works best for you, personally. She tailors her work for each client individually. Her website is: JenniferElizabethMasters.com

Friday, October 3, 2014

Joyful Eating, Loving and Weight Loss

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters


I am a sensual being. I love soft fabrics, beautiful colors, landscapes and I love food! When my family is home, I love to cook for them. This past week my daughter came home for a quick 5-day visit between college terms. I was delighted to have her visit. A week prior to her visit I began to drink a green drink that my son recommended on his blog: Naked Healthy. This drink recipe is listed below. While my daughter was here I ate pasta (which I have not eaten in over a year), a cheeseburger, Tiramisu, my favorite dessert, a bag of chocolates and Crème brûlée. We ate other things as well.  The gist of our visit was
road trips and eating. Food was a large part of what we enjoyed together.


My daughter, dogs and I took road trips to Ojai, Tehachapi and Malibu Beach. Each of these trips involved food and lots of it. The most amazing thing that happened is that today when I got on the scale at the gym (after missing 9 days of workouts) is that I lost 5 pounds! How could I eat to my heart's content, yet lose weight? This question will be answered below.

My daughter Ariel, is in culinary school studying to be a pastry chef. She loves food as much as I do. The entire five days of our visit we just loved each other. We did not argue. We did not even have a heated discussion. We enjoyed each other's presence. Joy and love was what caused me to burn off whatever we ate. Being happy and joyful is a high vibration. I had to share this experience with you to illustrate that the vibration of love and joy is life enhancing. You burn more calories when you are filled with love and joy. 


Living a life of fulfillment allows you to exude a high level of vibration. We tapped into a state of FLOW and vibrant health, by being in a state of LOVE and JOY for 5 solid days!


Here is the recipe for the green drink that I began to drink two weeks ago. Since that time, I have dropped 10 pounds! The most important ingredient besides the greens is the Chia seeds. Chia delivers a one-two punch with massive amounts of nutrients and few calories. You can drink this as a meal replacement. One 15 gram scoop of Chia contains: 3 grams of protein and 6 grams of fiber, 0 trans fat, 0 saturated fat, 4g polyunsaturated fat, 0 cholesterol, 0 sodium, 90 g potassium, 6 g carbohydrate, with no sugar. Chia seeds are high in Omega 3's and 6's, manganese, phosphorus and protein. Chia helps with diabetes, improves heart health and lowers blood sugar. Chia helps you feel full and clear the arteries of plaque. You will find your memory improves and your mind becomes more clear.

Salvia hispanica, the botanical name for CHIA, a member of the mint family. Around 2600 BC, Chia was their most important crop. It was used by the Aztecs and Mayans. The word CHIA, in Mayan means strength. They offered it to their Gods, used it in rituals and ceremonies. It was ground it into flour, used it in drinks and cooked with it. Aztecs warriors used Chia seeds to boost their energy and increase stamina, causing it to be referred to as "Aztec Running Food." Native American Indians also used Chia seeds as a part of their diet. Athletes today, especially distance runners use Chia to enhance their endurance with this super-food. 

1 scoop of Chia seeds soaked in 1.5 cups of pure water
1 stalk of celery chopped
1/2 an apple sliced
2 - 3 Kale leaves chopped
Handful of fresh spinach leaves
1/2 lemon without rind
Pinch of Himalayan salt or 1/2 tsp Honey 

Pulse in blender till smooth. Add more water if the consistency is too thick. Drink immediately.

I prefer a salty green drink - but everyone is different. Use honey if you prefer a sweet drink.




Yoda greeting Ariel at the airport

Jennifer's website is: JenniferElizabethMasters.com She is a catlytic life, love and empowerment coach for women. She is the author or Orgasm For Life, the Sex Bible For The New Age. You can e-mail Jennifer if you have questions about her blog, or coaching  JenniferElizabethMasters@gmail.com

Are They The Best of The Best?

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters





The beginning of a relationship is when everyone is on their best behavior. New relationships are the best of the best. Our feelings are fresh, not tainted with baggage or history. New love can be exciting, exhilarating and buoys your spirit. Colors appear brighter, ordinary events are more enjoyable and life is just better. 


New love can take our breath away. Sometimes our new love says or does something harsh or hurtful. They might make fun of an expression you make or something you cook. We like to look at the positive in people, especially in new relationships. However, we often dispel our intuition and explain bad and disrespectful behaviors away. When something early in your relationship stops you mid-breath and makes you go "Hmmmmm" you need to examine where it came from, what was the motivation and ask yourself if this negative behavior escalated over the next 10-20 years could I handle it? Is this something I can live with if it continues to get worse? 

Love yourself enough to stop and check bad behavior

Bad behavior left unchecked will always get worse. Your partner needs to be trained (yes trained) by you. He/she is looking for feedback and boundaries to see how far they can go. When you do nothing - there are no boundaries and they will continue to push and mistreat you if you do nothing.


It is true that early in our relationships we feel so happy we could almost burst. Often when red flags or signs that something isn't quite right appear, we often shove them aside and ignore them. This is called DENIAL. I did it. We all do it. When it really hits home is after three or four serious relationships, break-ups and divorces. We really need to become more sensitive to the red flags. We need to recognize our own worthiness. Each of us deserves to be treated with respect. We need to examine these signs carefully. 

There is power in self advocating. Calling our dates on this bad behavior immediately, will stop it from continuing. Ignoring it shows the other person that you have no boundaries and you accept their bad behavior. Bad behavior will not go away, it will only get worse over time. Most likely these red flags are signs that you may want to close one door to allow another one to open. If you stay with someone who disrespects you early on, without letting them know this is unacceptable to you, this behavior will get worse. 

REMEMBER:

The beginning of a relationship is when things are the best they will be. If situations are showing up now, have the courage to say, "I know I deserve to be treated with respect. If you won't, I will find someone who will."

Still wondering what this bad behavior could be? Here are some examples from real life relationships. 

Oh This One Is GOOD!

A mature woman begins to date a man, who is getting out of a 25-year marriage. He tells his new lady-friend that his soon-to-be ex cheated on him. He eventually admits that he cheated first, but he and his wife weren't having sex at the time (she was wearing granny panties to bed). The woman continues to date him for five months. They enjoy each other's company, dining out, but not meeting any of his friends. During this time, he is still living at home and sleeping in the same house (and most likely bed as his soon-to-be-ex-wife). BIG RED FLAG! 

He might divorce this woman - eventually. If he does, she will be the re-bound girl. She will end up listening to his tales of woe about how badly his wife is treating him. He will come to her with a hurt face, feeling sad about his lost marriage and how it feels to be betrayed. This makes this woman his confidant and therapist, rather than lover and eventual wife. These men rarely marry their confidants. If they do, they will most likely cheat on them as they cheated on their wife. Remember: As you do one thing is how you do everything. If a man cheated on his wife, with you or someone else, he will cheat on you also.

This is much more INSIDIOUS!

You meet a nice looking man who is secure financially, appears to be a humanitarian, helping out those in need and giving to friends and even strangers. He looks like a very good catch from the outside. He too is getting out of a long-term marriage. 

Although, he is further along in the process, he is also wounded. He did not cheat on his soon-to-be ex and has filed divorce papers. He tells you there is no way in HELL he would ever get back with his wife, because she cheated on him. He is heartbroken. Yet, two months down the road, you find out she has moved back in with your new gentleman, as she had no where else to go (her new boyfriend kicked her out - again). He tells you there is nothing to worry about and that he will absolutely not go back with her. You are left feeling uncomfortable and disconcerted.

Time passes on. You spend a couple of evenings a week with this man. He only sends text messages to communicate and might call once a week, only on a Friday. He has you in training. He is training you to not expect much, because he can't give very much.

Each date you find yourself drinking with him, even though you don't normally drink. He was a heavy smoker for over 30 years. He has just quit and begun to use electronic cigarettes instead. Your new-found gentleman tells you his wife is an alcoholic and he was just along for the ride. He drank only because she did, not because he HAD to. BIG RED FLAG! This is where we have to look at the actions, rather than the explanation of our date. Actions speak much louder and tell the truth, where words often lie. Many people are in denial of their own addictions and issues. If they don't see it as an issue, why should you (they think)? BECAUSE IT IS AN ISSUE!

On top of the drinking, you begin to notice little put-downs. He begins to make fun of your expressions, and tells you the food you have prepared is taste-less. This is a sign that this person does not love themselves. He is trying to make himself feel better by making you feel bad. People that are wounded wound others. Until this man gets over his own woundedness, he can't commit, and certainly won't be able to open his heart to you. He is emotionally unavailable. The alcohol is one strike, cigarettes the second, the put-downs are the third strike. We all know what three strikes mean in baseball. No more chances. You are OUT!

Chances are this man is also an alcoholic as well. Drinking every night constitutes alcoholism. This is a REALLY BIG FLAG. Thinking that you can accept alcoholism early in a relationship, is different than living with an alcoholic for 20 years. Alcoholics are emotionally unavailable. They often have other addictions, like smoking, sex or gambling. They often lie, cheat and become invisible or abusive while drinking. Best to get out before you are fully vested and end up broken hearted later on.

For the men out there:

You begin dating a gorgeous woman. She has an amazing body and dresses to enhance and show off her figure. Every date you have with her, she is wearing a push-up bra and very tight-fitting clothing. You love the way she looks, but so does every other guy that sees her. She loves the attention, obviously. You attend a party with her and she flirts with your best friend, your boss, and dances with anyone who asks. You mention that you are not comfortable with the fact that she is showing off her body and rubbing it all over everyone she dances with in front of you. You wonder if this is a passing fancy? Will her behavior change. Chances are it will, yet not for the better. If someone disrespects you by flirting with your friends and co-workers there is a serious issue about fidelity brewing. If you are comfortable in a polyamorous relationship, then this is not an issue. However, if you are looking for commitment, and fidelity, this woman is most likely not a good fit for you.

Closing One Door To Open Another

We often stay in relationships out of fear. We are afraid that we won't find anyone else. This fear will keep us in relationships that don't serve us, or even worse, are debilitating and abusive. When you leave a bad situation and change YOUR behavior, you will find another opportunity. Staying in a relationship, shows the Universe that this is what you will tolerate. You need to be in integrity and have the courage to leave. 


When you recognize that you deserve better and feel love for yourself, you become a magnet for love. Love will come to you, without you having to look for it. Staying in integrity and having a conversation to break up is the positive and conscious way to end a relationship. Having an affair with someone else, is a low vibrational and dishonoring way to exit. End the relationship on a high note by saying that it is not working for you. You can add that your boundaries are being crossed and you are being disrespected, or that you are out of integrity. When you do, someone else will show up before you can say "You're out!" You are showing The Universe what your intentions are. Intent will signal to the Universe that you are open and ready to be the next at bat.

Changing Your Behavior

If you historically stay in bad situations and allow yourself to be mistreated, you probably could benefit from working with Jennifer. I did this on my own. It took me years because I did it alone. Having someone who has been where you are and knows how to guide you onwards, upwards and into self love, personal power and lasting happiness, can save you years of misery, suffering and money! Divorces are expensive. Dating can be painful when you are operating on old software. Allow Jennifer to gently guide you into new programming that allows you to see the good in you. You will find the beauty inside you and feel life has meaning. 

I used to be extremely co-dependent. I have been where you are. I married the men with the bad behavior and stayed with them, because it was all I knew. I worked on myself for over 30 years to overcome feelings of inadequacy and disempowerment. I help you find the answers that are inside you. As an empowerment coach and healer, I help you recognize the patterns that keep repeating themselves so that you can see yourself as worthy, confident and powerful. When you step into your personal power life becomes easier. Anxiety, illness, depression naturally fall away. That was what happened with me. If I can to it, you can too! Contact me for a free individualized and private session. JenniferElizabethMasters@gmail.com


Friday, September 26, 2014

Thinking of Leaving? Think Again!

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters



Interview with Jennifer Elizabeth Masters about navigating conflict and what's in the book?


Women are programmed from an early age to look for our Prince Charming who will sweep us off our feet. We dream of our own wedding day and living happily ever after. When we do get married and realize that our marriage is not perfect and we are not living happily ever after, many women begin to look for that perfect man who will bring total happiness to her life. Many of us grew up believing that life and marriage can exist in total peace and harmony 100% of the time. When in reality, marriage is about compromise, resolving conflict and healing our personal issues.


Conflict is not something that we look for when we are dating. As a matter of fact, most of us will avoid conflict if we can.  We might even leave a relationship because of it. What if conflict is coming up to illustrate what your issues are? What if your partner is giving you a gift with this conflict? What if these issues that are surfacing are coming up to be healed? What happens if we walk away from our issues? All of these questions are answered below.


It is true we attract what we are. If we live in fear, we might attract a partner who we are afraid of. Or perhaps our worst fears are realized when our partner has an affair and betrays us. There could be anger issues that surface. Or perhaps security is our biggest issue, we might be plagued with joblessness, or financial issues throughout our marriage.


The way we heal is by drawing to us, what we need to heal and illustrate what our issues are. Which is why when we leave a situation before we have learned our lessons and dealt with the issues completely,  we end up attracting another mate, with the same or similar issues. You might think it is strange that we would attract someone that would be like an acne treatment and push out all our yucky stuff to the surface. However, everyone has issues. Not one of us on this planet is perfect. Looking for the perfect partner where there will be peace, calm, joy and happiness 100% of the time only occurs in fairy tales. If we didn't have this sharp contrast, we wouldn't appreciate the wonderful blissfully happy times when they occur.


Learning Our Lessons

If we don't complete our lessons on a particular issue, we will attract another partner where we will. You can't escape yourself. You can't escape your issues. You can divorce, move away, and find another partner who will bring exactly what needs to be healed to the surface. They may trigger us to react emotionally. We might even blame them for "making us feel" a certain way. Yet, they are not the issue, we are. Leaving a partner thinking that you can escape is not the answer. If there is love between the two of you, it is far better to stay in the marriage and work on these issues to heal them. If you don't, you will find another who looks very different, but will have the same issues which will help you work on and resolve yours. There is no escape, it is why we are here.


Soul Mates and Twin Flames

Many are looking and searching for their soul mates thinking that they will not have conflict or problems when they find them. Soul mates are perfectly suited to us, bringing out our deepest fears, deficits and challenges. Often times, after someone has experienced a deep soul mate connection, they say, NEVER AGAIN! Soul mates are just the person to help us heal and resolve patterns, ingrained insecurities and challenges. Twin Flames come in for a short time to teach us a profound lesson, usually about what REAL LOVE is. These relationships can be tumultuous and short.

How This Works

The more that we learn to love ourselves, the more we have to give others. We have to give to receive and the person we have to give to first - is US! The more loving and accepting of ourselves we are, the more loving and accepting of others we will be. When we state, "I don't think there is anyone for me." We create with that thought. Instead, asking, "I wonder how I could attract a love, effortlessly and easily?

The Purpose of Relationships

Relationships help us learn about ourselves in a rapid way. Our mates act as mirrors for us, showing us who we are, over and over again. Sometimes we even project our fears and feelings onto others, insisting that they are the other persons' issues. The more we protest that it isn't us, the more it is.

Living alone, we don't heal as quickly as we do in relationships. We still encounter people in our world that will trigger an emotional response, but none will be so profound as those in intimate relationships with us. Many people choose to live alone, because they don't want to face their issues. Or they don't want to be hurt. Humans are meant to be in relationships. This is why we were created to fit together so beautifully like two puzzle pieces. 

Our True Purpose Here On Earth

Do you wonder why you are here? Our true purpose is to heal, grow and evolve. Our soul's reason for being is to be enlightened. In the process of living our lives, we are meant to return the favor and give to others. We all have gifts to give. Some of us are teachers, some of us are gifted mechanics, doctors, attorneys or construction workers. Everyone has a gift. These gifts are to be used to help others. 

Resolving Conflict
  1. Breathe and take a moment to get centered before speaking out with intense emotion. Once words are spoken it is very difficult to take them back. 
  2. Make sure you listen to what your partner is saying and repeat back to them: "I hear you saying, that when I ________ that you ____________." This way your partner feels heard. 
  3. Use I statements. "I feel that ________" "When you say _____ I feel __________."
  4. Avoid pointing fingers. No one wants to be told that they are wrong. We shut down when someone makes us wrong. Telling your partner that you are right and they are wrong is ego-based. it will not win you any kisses, favors or brownie points.
  5. Look inside to see where this issue has come up before. Where did it originate? Most likely you are upset and triggered about something that has NOTHING to do with what is going on in the PRESENT MOMENT. Most of our issues are from childhood. 
  6. Take responsibility for your own actions, emotions and words. 
  7. Remember at the end of the day, you will be climbing into bed with your partner. Love is the name of the game, not winning.
REMEMBER

The sweet woman I interviewed about her loving 60 year marriage said: 

If you must argue, ask yourself, will this matter in 5 years? If the answer is NO! Then go and make love, it is infinitely more fun than fighting.

Jennifer Elizabeth Masters is the author of Orgasm For Life, a book to bridge the chasm between men and women, resolve conflict and deepen the intimate connection. It answers all the questions about sex, love and relationship. It is the SEX BIBLE! Jennifer's website is: http://www.JenniferElizabethMasters.com  Her e-mail address is: JenniferElizabethMasters@gmail.com

Jennifer is more than a certified coach. She holds certificates in Energy Healing, Hypnotherapy and NLP. She is highly intuitive, and compassionate. Yet at the same time direct and will hold your feet to the fire. She will push you, be your biggest cheerleader and GET YOU. She has an innate ability to understand you at a soul level. Clients have commented that she understands them like no one else does. You can't say more than that about a coach!


Wednesday, September 24, 2014

5 Ways Anger Shortens Your Life

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters



Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured. - Mark Twain


Have you ever wondered where anger comes from? When our partner snipes at us for not remembering directions, or for taking too long to get ready, there are countless reasons to be angry.


At the same time, anger raises our blood pressure, can break blood vessels, causing heart attacks and strokes. Relationships suffer with unresolved anger and often end in divorce, like mine did. What is good about that? Absolutely nothing. So how can we navigate life and utilize anger in a healthy way. Do we stuff it? Or is there a way to peace some other way? 

Each of us is the sum of all our experiences. Our childhood created a filter which we look through. This filter colors our experience of life. Which is why three people can witness the same event and have very different reactions to it. Some of us had parents who were angry and out of control. As a result, we have had to learn new ways of behaving. Changing deeply ingrained patterns is not always easy. However, following in the footsteps of a rageaholic and repeating the same patterns is not a productive or healthy path to be on.

What Is Anger

Anger is an emotional response to a thought triggered by a situation or event. The original purpose of anger in it's simplest form was to assist us to survive. Anger shows us when our boundaries have been crossed, or we have been disrespected.  

How Can Anger Shorten Your Life?

  1. Rage and anger raise blood pressure, damaging blood vessels and the heart. Anger is the biggest predictor of stroke and heart disease, more than smoking, obesity and high blood pressure.
  2. Divorce happens when one or both people cannot resolve, and heal anger issues. Divorce causes stress. Stress causes all kinds of health issues. Men living alone, live shorter lives than married men do.
  3. Long-standing anger and resentment can cause cancer. Each angry or resentful thought we think that is angry creates acidity in our body. An acid environment left unchecked creates cancer.
  4. Anger clouds our judgment and we can make rash decisions while driving, causing an accident which can take your life.
  5. Often people with un-checked rage kill others. Jealous lovers, jilted spouses take their emotions out on their partner's new lover. Any physical violence in the name of anger is an excuse for immaturity, lack of personal responsibility and self control. We have been trained to believe that things that we "own" define us. Relationships, cars, homes, belongings are all material things. They are not who you truly are. This training, falsely makes us believe that when we lose what we thought we had, whether it is a relationship, a home or vehicle, that we are no longer who we thought we were. Yet each of us is so much more that the material belongings in our lives. We are powerful beyond measure, full of wisdom, beauty and talent. These gifts that we each have are far more meaningful than anything material.

Personal Experience

My daughter's father, Rich Resuta was a man who raged out of control. He had a father who was an alcoholic, sex addict and an abuser. Rich witnessed his father punch his mother in the jaw when he was 8 years old. In a regression, this event was re-lived. As an eight-year old boy witnessing his mother helpless and bleeding in front of him caused tremendous trauma. He backed up against the living room wall trying to become invisible and stuffed his fist almost down his throat. In his conscious mind, the event never happened. Till the day he died he did not remember his mother being hit by his father. However, his actions belied his conscious memory. He could not control his rage. In the end, he died a very young man at the age of 52. 

There are ways to navigate and heal deep anger issues. Hypnotherapy is one way. Neurolinguistic Programming is another. An acupuncture treatment and herbs can balance the spleen and liver which process anger physically in the body. Sometimes, our systems are out of whack and we don't even know it. The point is that most people cannot change their lives in a permanent way without help. 

Awareness

Noticing how quickly we go to what I call the "Dark Side," and get stuck there is the first step. Humans are programmed to be negative. In the absence of information, we see the negative first. We have to re-program our minds to see the light, the positive in any situation. Our teachers and family members did not teach us how to navigate our emotions. This is something that we need to train ourselves to do. Clearly, it is a matter of life and death. Changing our focus, can be done, we need to recognize what is at stake if we don't. (Read the 5 ways anger causes death again.) 


To be happy, to me, is to suffer less. If we were not capable of transforming the pain within ourselves, happiness would not be possible. Thich Nhat Hanh


Simple Steps To Take Now

  1. Be mindful.  Mindfulness means being aware of the present moment. 
  2. Breathe in. I recognize my anger. Breathe out, I smile to my anger.
  3. Sigh Loudly. An audible sigh can move a lot of energy quickly. If you still feel stuck - repeat.
  4. Smile. Smiling to yourself, allows you to embrace your anger. It can quickly change your mood. You are telling yourself, "I am here for you."
  5. Move your body. Shaking your arms, moving your legs, walking can all help you release energy that you are feeling in your body.
  6. Be there for yourself. Allow yourself to feel what you feel, without reacting to it. 
  7. Show yourself compassion. Compassion will open up your heart. Allow the energy to move through you, rather than holding on to it.
  8. Breathe. Inhaling and Exhaling three times deeply will help you to refocus. Breathing will help you clear your energy. It will also bring you into the present. Often we are reacting to a past issue that has nothing to do with what is happening in the present. Past situations often compound the way we are feeling right now. BREATHE AGAIN.
  9. See the situation differently. There are always two sides to every story. Can you put yourself in the other person's shoes? See the other person's perspective. 
Getting Stuck

When we focus on what we don't want we often get stuck. Words like, "no, no way, I won't, I don't want," lead us back to a circle of woe that we are working to get out of. Instead, pick up a pen and write down what you would like to get out of the current situation. 

Hypnotherapy, Neurolinguistic Programming and Energy healing can all help process anger. All of these are tools that I utilize in my coaching. Meditation, chanting and mantras are all great ways to help raise our vibration and get unstuck. If you would like to work on an issue and test the waters so to speak to see how working with me would be, I offer a tune-up session to first time clients of 20 minutes. You can e-mail me if you would like to set up yours. E-mail Jennifer