Excerpt From Orgasm For Life
Tantra - Is It True What We Heard About Sting?
After I healed deep and painful issues through Tantra, my sexual experience is now very different. Tantra focuses on the pleasure of the moment and less on the end result. Tantra teaches you to circulate your sexual energy in your body, choosing when you want to release it in orgasm (for men) rather than making orgasm the focus. When men hold and circulate their sexual energy within their body, they are able to make love for much longer periods of time. The benefit for the woman with Tantra is that she has the time needed to raise her sexual energy and reach high levels ecstasy.
Tantra is a style of meditation and ritual which began around the fifth century A.D. in India. The spiritual practice of Tantric sex focuses on enlightenment, reverence for your partner, and the sacredness of sex. It is a slow process of breathing, eye gazing, meditation prior to sex together, and love-making which removes the focus from orgasm. This Eastern tradition teaches that men lose precious life force by allowing themselves to ejaculate every time they have sex.
When love-making continues for more than an hour, and the sexual energy is circulated up into the center of the forehead (third eye) a man does not lose precious life force energy. However, when men ejaculate in less than an hour, their sexual energy has not had enough time to circulate through the body, meaning life force is lost. Most men who practice Tantra choose whether to ejaculate or not. They can continue making love for hours with their erection waning and then building again. This is a wonderful way to experience each other and give the woman ample time to reach orgasm. She can have many orgasms this way. For the male counterpart, most want to ejaculate at some point to experience the intensity of this type of orgasm. Often this is once a week or less. It is up to the individual.
The western focus on sex is the end result - orgasm. The recording artist, Sting made a comment to an interviewer 20 years ago, about making love for hours with his wife. Tantra is far more than lasting a long time. Sting has tried to recant his comment in a variety of ways. He now explains it this way, that his wife, Trudy, is his church. Tantra has far more to do with reverence for your partner than longevity in the sexual act. This by itself gives sex the energy of sacredness. Tantra is about giving and receiving, taking turns giving slow pleasure to the other.
When you are receiving pleasure in tantra, you enjoy each moment, allowing yourself to just feel and enjoy the pleasure. Slowing down the process of sex, allows sexual energy to build, and then fall, reach a crescendo and fall again. Taking turns giving to one another in each session could mean sensual massage where one person gives fully without sex. Focusing on the other person’s body fully, giving them pleasure can change the way you look at one another outside of the bedroom. Receiving pleasure for an hour, without any thought or concern about giving back to your partner in a session can be incredibly freeing and invigorating. This can raise your sexual energy and is a great place to begin for couples who have been sexless for a long period of time. We can get so caught up in focusing on orgasm that we miss the beautiful sensual moments in between.
Tantra focuses on reverence, in the moment. It brings back the sacredness of sex, which many of us have lost. Instead of using your partner for personal gratification, the focus is on giving to the other, and then receiving.
You know those Scientific Journals filled with research data from sterile laboratories?
This isn't one of those.
Written from personal experience, Jennifer's data was collected between the sheets. Her candid, honest style draws you into her bedroom sharing over 40 years of passion, experimentation and insight.
Healing sexual dysfunction is Jennifer's passion.
"Sexy, passionately written, and inspiring."
If Orgasm for Life doesn't turn you on, while igniting the passion in your relationship, it's time for an EKG!
Orgasm For Life, Kindle edition
