3 Reasons You Shouldn't Worry About What Others Think

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

Ariel with her PURPLE hair not listening to the opinions of others

The problem with the opinions of others is that everyone has one and they aren't yours. Listening to what others think about you will diminish your power and self-esteem. 

So many people along the way, whatever it is you aspire to do, will tell you it can’t be done. But it all it takes is imagination. You dream. You plan. You reach.”― Michael Phelps

Women worry about what others think about the way they dress, do their makeup, fix their hair and the way their children behave. We believe that everyone connected with us reflects negatively or positively on us. Worrying about what others think will make you feel insecure, unattractive and self-conscious. The following reasons should compel you to give other's opinions a pass and focus on how you feel instead.

1. No one knows how you feel but you. When we listen to what others think about us, we doubt ourselves and therefore change ourselves to please other people. Pleasing others isn't authentic. We are happiest when we are completely authentic, standing in our personal power. It is one thing to be kind and compassionate toward others and an entirely different subject when we give our power over to someone who has strong opinions about the way we think, talk or behave.

2. It's not someone else's job to like us, it's ours. Living in our heart rather than our head, trusting what our heart speaks to us rather than believing what our mind says, will help us be softer, kinder to ourselves. When we listen to our heart, we are powerful, intuitive and grounded. Our heart speaks a wisdom of certainty and truth for us. When we worry about what others think of us, we short-circuit the wisdom of our heart and believe what our mind thinks.

3. It is not your business to worry about what someone else thinks about you. Making the thoughts of others your concern will take you down a long spiral of negativity, or worry, and taking care of others. The only person you can control is you. So let go of the burden of trying to please others and focus on how you feel. 

Wear what makes you feel good. Dress for yourself, wear makeup to make yourself feel good. Wear your hair the way you like it rather than attempting to please someone else. Stop worrying about what is in fashion, and wear what pleases you.

Once we stop worrying about what others think about us life becomes lighter, happier and less burdensome. Be the best you that you can be rather than attempting to fulfill the needs of some other person by trying to please them. 

If I listened to what others thought I wouldn't have:

• trusted my Guidance
• gotten divorced
• moved to the US over thirty years ago away from my toxic parents
• become a Georgia Master Gardener
• had a profitable landscape business working with Hispanic men for 11 years
• flown to India in 2009
• had a baby at 41 (daughter Ariel)
• colored my daughter's hair purple after her father died (then pink, then turquoise)
• trusted my instinct and moved to Boulder, Co in 2011
• become a Hypnotherapist and energy healer
• taken a trip to Bali in 2010
• written books
• started a blog
• quit my day job to become a full-time coach and healer
• moved to California where I have peace, tranquility and easily afford a house, paid off my car and began to make really great money
• walked and then danced in the desert every day
• dated a man 
• taken in four kittens someone dumped in the desert
• adopted Karma, my dog 16 years ago
• drive back and forth from California to Boulder five times a year where I feel tremendous joy and receive great inspiration during the drive and while in Colorado
• walk to the beat of my drum, being authentically me, happy, fulfilled and peaceful

Live your life with compassion, kindness, mindfulness and awareness. Notice how you feel inside. Breathe deeply to ground and bring yourself fully into your body and the present moment. Living in this moment rather than worrying about the future with others will leave a lot of room for fun, spontaneity and happiness.

3 Ways We Unconsciously Turn Love Away

Jennifer Elizabeth Masters learned her lessons through experience. She brings her life's wisdom to her sessions. She became a seeker at the age of sixteen. Through her personal healing of depression, anxiety, Fibromyalgia, abuse, co-dependence has given her great compassion and understanding of your issues, allowing her to get to the root of your problems quickly without judgment.

If you are ready to commit to being happier in relationships, attract the love you long for and heal the broken feeling inside you, Jennifer's the one to empower you, as she has been there and done it and knows how to help you on your road to bliss, joy and fulfillment.

3 Ways We Unconsciously Turn Love Away

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

I have just returned from San Jose and a powerful three-day retreat with 700 of my closest friends:  healers and entrepreneurs. We committed to growing and shed our crap. I cried, I resisted, and I shifted my perspective in so many ways. 

When we are open to receive new perspectives, opportunities present themselves. I even posed for photos with an Iowa farm league hockey team! I have stepped up my game and opened my heart a little more. Opening my heart further is allowing me to be more vulnerable with my clients and in my writing. We will get back to my Orgasm For Life Book tomorrow.

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Being vulnerable means that we allow others to see us authentically. When we are vulnerable, we become more open to expressing our deepest truth. Opening the door of my heart is allowing me to reveal all that has changed in my perspective through a willingness to look at my shit! One of the issues I looked at this past weekend is my fear of men leaving me by dying. 

If a past event has been traumatic, we often hold that trauma in our cells without realizing it. The emotions of horror, terror, and fear stay within our cells. Consciously releasing trapped emotions from our bodies shifts the energy we emit. We attract what we are.

After enjoying our second date at the beach, we said our good-byes in the parking lot. As he got into his vehicle, I turned toward my car thinking briefly, "I wonder if I'll see him again?" The thought passed through me quickly. I didn't recognize the emotion that powered the thought. With a very slight turn of my head to the left, I felt a CRUNCH! My shoulder and neck seized up and was completely frozen. I was in immediate physical pain.  The physical manifestation of my emotions = PAIN! I knew I had created it. I had to pay attention to see what this was about for me.

My unconscious belief that all men die or leave was coming up with a vengeance. I have had two men die and three cheated. One event could leave someone scarred. Two deaths and three cheaters left me feeling untrusting of myself when it comes to choosing men. I listen carefully and watch to see if actions align. When words and actions are not congruent, it is a big sign that they aren't honest. The man I am dating had very similar core values to mine. He is authentic, honest and vulnerable.

I felt that my past experiences led to me being insecure in ways I hadn't been before. I had to step into the void and take a risk. If I didn't, I knew there wasn't a chance of finding love.

My shoulder and neck seizing up immediately after my date left were a sign I was beginning to feel something, and it scared the heck out of my body! Shoulders are all about our ability to carry out our experiences joyously. Neck problems are about refusing to see other sides of a question. Stubbornness and inflexibility are both issues related to the neck. Who me? Who's calling me stubborn? I thought I was pretty flexible. Maybe my body knows differently.

My shoulder began to heal while in San Jose. As I approached our third date, I noticed my shoulder was getting tighter and more painful. My body was telling me about my unconscious beliefs. Each time we were getting together, my shoulder seized up. Four times is a charm, right? I had fear stuck in my body from the death of these two

men. I found a man who was lovely, spiritual, kind, mindful, gentle, strong and tall. There was great potential here. Our age difference was my issue not his. I was afraid he would leave me or die. I am currently clearing this trapped emotion from my cells. Recognizing the problem is the first step. Awareness shifts everything.

3 Ways We Turn Love Away

1. Thinking you will never find anyone that will accept you.
2. Thinking you aren't good enough, young enough, pretty enough. ENOUGH! YOU ARE ENOUGH!
3. Making false judgments about what other people think about you. Oh yes, you do! We believe others are having certain thoughts about us: "You think I'm too old for you. You think I'm too fat! You think I'm not your type." Making a false assumption ruins our chances at finding lasting love. Assuming is a form of self-sabotage.

To be completely honest with you, I began dating a delightful man 17 years my junior. I talked about the elephant in the room on our first date. He said he was fine with it. I brought it up on our second date. He said, "I think you are beautiful!" He went on to say he found me to be a hottie. I had to recognize that my feelings were my feelings. I was projecting my insecurity (yes, I felt insecure about our age difference) on him. It was false. I have let it go! Own your crap and get out of your way!

FEAR: FALSE BELIEFS APPEARING REAL

Don't blame someone else for what you feel about you. In answer to your burning question: yes, we are still dating. We aren't rushing anything; we are allowing a friendship to grow and are building a foundation from the ground up. Sex too soon places the emphasis on the physical and diminishes a connection on a soul level. It can also show a lack

of respect for each other and creates a false impression of trust. How can you have trust when you don't know the other person? Trust is built in small increments a little at a time. Once you trust each other, an opening occurs, then love-making becomes soulful, reverent and sacred. That is what I want. What do you want? 

We All Have Issues

When we commit to grow and evolve, we turn our reflection inward toward ourselves. Resistance to notice what is going on inside ourselves causes us to blame others for our circumstances even our unhappiness. If we aren't growing and evolving, we are dying. 

How Can You Lovingly Accept All Of You?

Everyone has shadow selves. Our shadow self is the darkest parts of ourselves we would rather ignore. It could be old behavior, hoarding, blame, not accepting responsibility or emotions we haven't dealt with and released. Turning our focus inward and looking at ourselves with a soft focus is what my work is all about. When we look at our dark side, we shed light on it. With light and awareness, we begin to shift. We let go of old beliefs. We can be open to healing modalities to release energy and allow our truest version of ourselves to emerge:

1. Drop the baseball bat. Stop beating the crap out of yourself.
2. Let go of the magnifying glass. Focusing on your faults and flaws makes them bigger. Instead, lovingly accept ALL OF YOU! Focusing on your flaws isn't helping you; it is hurting you. See the good in you!
3. Soften your gaze. Look at yourself with eyes of love. Treat yourself as if you are your lover. 
4. Everything happens for a reason. Let go of the past. It served you well. It brought you to this place. It taught you a lesson. It made you who you are. It gave you a book or two to write. 
5. Be grateful for everything you have. Gratitude for the lessons, the pain, the sorrow, and the suffering is a way to accept yourself lovingly.
6. Let go. Holding onto old hurts makes us sick. If you can't let go on your own, hire a loving coach that has been where you are. We can't do this alone. It took me 30 years of searching, healing and deep introspection to become happy with me as I am - alone or with a partner. I can shorten the time it takes to get you there because I have been where you are. I know what works and what doesn't.

What You Are At Your Core

The soul essence of each and every individual on this planet is LOVE. Yes, my friends, everyone has love at their core. Our life circumstances, hurt, fears, anxiety all load us up with a pile of crap that doesn't serve us and bogs us down. I would love to partner with you to empower you to find the love within so that you too can live each day in harmony, happiness and love! 

Contact Jennifer for your FREE Discovery Session TODAY! 

If this article helped you,  please share it with a friend. Sharing is caring! If you are ready to take your life, relationship, or self-esteem to the next level, book your FREE discovery session right now! 

Aphrodite Effect is all about the effect of LOVE on all that we do. Venus was the Greek Goddess of love. She was an ageless beauty, powerful, strong, respected, sexual and knew who she was. She loved herself

fearlessly. Love gives us power, ageless beauty and deep connection. Set up your FREE discovery session with me here. JenniferElizabethMasters@gmail.com

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13 Powerful Cures For Worry

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

"I am an old man and I have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened." ~ Mark Twain

Worry can cause stomach upset, weight loss, cortisol rise and untold stress on the body and mind. Worry consumes our time, energy and life force. When we worry, we miss out on much of life. We may have insomnia and anxiety from our worries. We miss out on much of life. We may even miss out on love. 

What Fears Do You Have?

Fears and worry often accompany one another. If you worry you often also have intense fears. People fear snakes, spiders, flying, being hurt, having their children die, getting pregnant, getting an STD, having your partner cheat, being abandoned, dying, getting sick, getting cancer, the list goes on. Fears trap us in the belief that what we are afraid of is real. A phobia is another word for fear. Phobias stop us from experiencing life and love fully. I used to be one of those people. Until I read the survey results, I had forgotten how fearful I used to be. I was led to create "Love Yourself Fearlessly," from what I learned. This program is my foundational work which leads you to love.

Is There A Positive Side To Worry?

Many people believe falsely that worry protects them. Worry can keep you up at night, make you nervous and jumpy during the day. Worry affects job performance, relationships, and your children. If we are worriers, we train and imprint our children with our beliefs and fears. There is no positive side to worry. Worry does not help you nor does it protect you. Worry is a waste of energy. Worry is a wasted emotion. Worry is destroying your life.

The Truth About Worry

Statistics prove that 40% of what we worry about will never happen. 30% of what you are worrying about has already happened. 12% are needless worries are about what others think of us. 10% of our worries are about being late, what to wear, what to cook for dinner, or what time people will be home. 8% of what we worry about actually happens. Of this 8%, 4% are about natural disasters or death of a loved one. The worry is often more damaging than the actual event itself. Worry is a wasted energy and emotion. Worrying about the past is like closing the barn door after the horses have already run away - pointless! 

Worry is a fear about something that we imagine could happen. Worry is not based on reality. It is based on something that we imagine, therefore it is based on a false premise. Worry is a fear that repeats in a loop. The more we worry about something happening, the more trapped we feel. What we worry about or fear rarely happens. 

Worry is An Unending Spiral

We get into an unending loop of thoughts when we worry. It could be thoughts about how we are going to have enough to pay our mortgage, rent, bills or debt. Regret about our decisions or actions can cause worry as well. Some of the thoughts could be:

"IF ONLY.......

"I stayed home......"

"didn't sleep with him"

"didn't buy that dress....(car, book, phone)"

"I didn't say that....."

OR

"WHAT IF.....

"I get fired....

"can't pay my bills..."

"my daughter gets pregnant"

"my boss hates me"

"I lose the sale...."

"no one likes me"

"I never find someone to love me..."

When I used to worry, I would wake up at 2:30 or 3:30 every night. My thoughts would begin. I worked myself up into a frenzy so that I was awake for hours. My stomach would become acidic and upset. I created canker sores in my mouth and I finally ended up taking Benadryl to sleep. This does not serve you or help you in any way. 

Here are some things that I did to stop this spiral:

1. Pray. I changed my worry into a prayer. Instead of worrying about the thought, I asked God, my Guides and the angels to take care of what my worry was. "Creator of my being, Guides, and angels that protect me, please take this worry from me. Take care of this issue for me. Allow me to sleep in peace. Thank you for your service to me. Amen."
2. Use a mantra. A mantra can be very healing. I used them in meditation and throughout my day. This is what I teach my coaching clients to replace negative thoughts about themselves and their lives. A mantra is always positive. The best time to use a mantra is when your mind is in neutral - then it accesses your unconscious mind where permanent change occurs. However, I recommend using them in place of a worrisome thought. It could be as simple as, "I LOVE ME!" or "THE UNIVERSE ALWAYS HAS MY BACK." "THE UNIVERSE LOVES ME." 
3. Faith. When we are in fear, we can't be in faith. When I KNEW without a doubt that God/The Divine/The Universe always had my back and was working FOR my good, everything changed. I know this to be true. Until you recognize this truth, you need to strengthen your faith. Faith is knowing without a doubt that God is on your side. Your angels protect you. (I see this when I am saved from death driving in my car repeatedly and my bills are paid miraculously.)
4. Write a To Do List. Writing things down that need to be done can help you create order. The Universe loves order. The more order in your mind, the more order in your home and vise Versa. When you have order, you will also have peace Work daily on your to-do list.
5. Prioritize. Not everything is urgent. Do what absolutely needs to get done to chip away at your list. As you complete a task, cross it off your list. Congratulate yourself for accomplishing one more thing. 
6. Stop The Self-Flagellation. Monks used to beat themselves (literally) with a whip. They would stand in their little chamber strip off their robe and hit themselves with a leather whip. When you beat yourself up with your words and thoughts you are making yourself smaller and less significant. Know you are worthy. Know you have a purpose. Know you are love deep inside. Love is the answer. Love you. Allow you to feel the love that The Universe and God has for you. If you don't believe in God - (I didn't till I was in my 30s) you will continue to flail about and feel useless. My faith has become stronger as I have heard and seen miracles in my life. I can help you with this.
7. Get Busy. When you sit around doing nothing, your mind has too much time. When you don't give your mind something to do or focus on it will run amok. Get on your hands and knees and wash your kitchen floor. Then do your bathroom floor. Clean the litter box. Wash your car. While you are doing these tasks use your mantra or find something to be grateful for.
8. Gratitude. When we begin to recognize what we have, we are focusing on the good, rather than the negative. Shifting your focus from negative to positive makes your mind quiet down. Your body prefers positive thought to negative also. Gratitude will shift you faster than any other thing. If you can't think of anything to be grateful for use this: "Thank you for another day of life. Thank you for my vibrant health. Thank you for my friends. Thank you for the love in my life (even if you don't see it - beginning to give thanks for something opens you up to the possibility of it and allows love to come to you) thank you for my hands that work, my legs that move and my eyes that see. Thank you for the birds that sing, thank you for the trees that give me shade.
9. Give. Give to someone less fortunate than you. Clean out your closets and take your old belongings to people who need them. Giving opens you up to receive more. There is always someone who has less than you. Give a dollar to the homeless person on the street corner.
10. Call a loved one. Talking to someone who isn't a worrier can help calm you down. 
11. Watch a funny movie or comedian. Laughter heals. Laughter will shift you. I stopped watching television with commercials, the news or reading papers over 15 years ago. My life is much more calm, happy and positive as a result of letting go of that negativity. 
12. Meditate. Meditation will shift you from worry, fear or even anger quickly. I have a You Tube video that will help you if you BELIEVE that you can't meditate. Stay open to new ideas. Do it once and see how it changes your life. Do it daily and it will change your life. I have also written a blog about The Divine Presence Process Meditation which includes the video.
13. Breathe. Breathe slowly, filling your lungs while focusing on your breath. As you inhale, relax your shoulders. At the top of your inhalation when your lungs are completely filled, slowly begin to exhale. Exhale all the air in your lungs completely and begin to inhale again. Each time you inhale do so slowly, filling your lungs as full as you can. Most of you are barely breathing. Breathing deeply will bring you into the present where you will find your worries disappear. 

To further assist you in clearing your fear, worries and anxiety, I am offering a three-part series to bust you out of your worry, fear and anxiety before the biggest energy hits this planet on September

28th. This is a perfect time, during the Mercury Retrograde to go back and eliminate things that don't serve you.

Stay tuned for this incredible opportunity to work with me at an extremely affordable price, get your fears and worry cleared and become lighter, freer and more positive as a result. Don't miss this three-part series beginning Monday, Septebmer 21st.

If you e-mail me in advance I will absolutely clear your specific worries for you on the call! JenniferElizabethMasters@gmail.com

As You Do One Thing Is How You Do Everything

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

History repeats itself. The quote,  "As you do one thing is how you do everything," is an ongoing message for our lives. Ask yourself the following questions to see where this pattern appears in your life.

1. Do you give to others more than you give to yourself? 
2. Do you keep yourself so busy that you are in avoidance of life events, resolving conflicts, pleasure, and  conversations?
3. Is your car clean, tidy and fresh smelling?
4. Do you spend time working on your internal self as much as you work out at the gym?
5. Do you take your vitamins daily?
6. Do you spend time on things that don't matter?
7. Do you stay at home because you are avoiding relationships?
8. Do you work all the time?
9. Do you disapprove of yourself?

Giving:

We often give to others more than we give to ourselves. This tendency puts other's needs before ours, making us insignificant. If this is a pattern in your life, you may want to look at other co-dependent tendencies. When we give too much of ourselves to others, we end up feeling exhausted and even resentful because our loved ones have come to expect these things from us.

Taking care of yourself first, means that you will get enough rest, take time out and pat yourself on the back for a job well done. 

Avoidance:

When we are so busy with life, we often miss "living." If you are too busy to have sex with your partner, play with your child, help with homework, have a conversation with a friend, it is time to prioritize. Children grow up, partners leave, and friends have their own lives too. Avoidance can be a sign of being emotionally unavailability. If you don't want to "feel" pain, or emotions you could be avoiding all the areas and people that can bring you the most love and joy. 

Uncluttered home, uncluttered mind, clean car, clear mind

If your home and car are cluttered, so is your mind. You have too many things going on all at the same time. We often create this mess so that we don't have to look at our emotions. If our home and car is cluttered, focus, concentration and forward movement become impossible. Take one thing at a time. Clean out and wash your car. Tidy and pick up clutter in your home. Prioritize what is most important in your business. Take one thing at a time. A cluttered mind creates chaos in your world. You will find that you do not move forward, tend to vacillate with decision making and are unsuccessful in your business.

As within, so without

Do you spend hours at the gym, but no time in introspection? Or do you do the opposite, spend hours in meditation  but no time exercising your physical body? Forgetting to eat or eating things you know are not in your highest and best interest? Feeding the physical body healthy life sustaining foods and taking care of our spiritual and emotional selves is important for our mind, body and spirit to be in balance. 

Vitamins and Health 

Many of us are healers, counselors and coaches. We give great advice to our clients, but often forget to take our vitamins. Taking your own advice is of great benefit to your health. Optimum health, optimum life. When we put our own health on the back burner, we are making ourselves unimportant. Take your own advice and take care of you first. This way, you will have so much more to give your family, business and clients.

Wasting Time 

You check your e-mail four times a day, but don't have time to call your mother or best friend? We have all done it. Obsessing over the things that aren't that important, we often miss the bigger picture, family and friends. Worry is the biggest time and energy waster. How much time do you spend envisioning all the horrible things that might happen? Life is short, wasting the time you have, means that you have less for the good stuff - like LOVE!

Staying Home

You say you want a relationship, but come home every night immediately after work. You avoid clubs, joining a team or a gathering where you could potentially meet your Beloved. You will never meet your guy or girl sitting in front of your television at home! If you have been reading carefully, this is a repeat of the first issue: avoidance. Avoiding living life fully means that you are missing out on joy, fun and possible happiness. Where else do you say, "NO" when you mean "YES!"?

Work, Work Work

If all you do is work and sleep, you are out of balance. Life is like a tightrope. It is a balancing act of recreation, work, pleasure, spirituality and fun. If you are missing out on any of these you are out of balance. You have to give to get, you have to be open to receive to receive love. If you are working all the time, you may be closed off to the possibility of love and joy. Do you say to yourself, "Oh, no one will ever love me." or "No one will ever find me." If you think these things you are right. The Universe will make you right. 

Opportunity Knocks When You Are Open

In order to win the lottery, you have to buy a ticket. If you want love, but are never anywhere you will meet someone, you are telling yourself you are undeserving of, or unworthy of love. You are saying "NO" to the Universe when you are asking for things to change. You have to be open to receive in order to get what you want. You have to be receptive to new ideas, change and doing things differently, or you will get what you have always got. 

Praise For YOU!

You may be kind to others, but self deprecating. You inner dialogue needs to reflect love to the outside world. When we beat ourselves up it is reflected in all that we are. We let the world and the Universe know we are undeserving and unworthy by our negative words and thoughts about ourselves. You are already beautiful, intelligent, talented and gifted. Isn't it time you noticed?When you notice how wonderful you are, others will begin to notice also. 

Much love to you. I would love to hear how these patterns play out in your world.

Jennifer is a life, love, and relationship coach. She is a teacher of life, love and wisdom. Her coaching style is compassionate and direct. If you are still pondering whether you need to work with a coach, e-mail your questions, or set up a discovery session. Jennifer has several different offerings right for any one's budget. Her 6 week video course is $98. This workshop is a self study, with a weekly workbook that guides you into your inner journey to Love Yourself Fearlessly. For the next 30 days Jennifer is offering a free one-hour session when you sign up for this video course - a $225 value~ ! Contact Jennifer NOW!