Boundaries are one of the most misunderstood parts of any relationship. Without boundaries we have no sense of where someone ends and we begin. When we do not set healthy limits and boundaries, we often end up with an emotional reaction. Anger is often the triggered emotion when someone crosses that invisible line in the sand.
- your personal needs
- your personal happiness
- your personal integrity
- your personal desires
- You say yes, when you mean "HELL NO!"
- Accepting sex when you don't want it.
- You feel guilty for saying no.
- You don't speak up when someone mistreats you.
- You become overly involved in other's problems.
- You give too much, to be perceived as worthy or useful.
- You act out of integrity to please others.
- You agree with or adopt other's beliefs just to fit in and be accepted.
- You don't define your emotional needs in your personal relationships.
- You allow yourself to be interrupted in order to please or meet another's needs. Putting other's needs before yours.
- We don't know ourselves.
- We don't know what we like and don't like.
- We don't know what brings us happiness or makes us unhappy.
- Therefore we have difficulty assessing what we truly desire.
- We can't be authentic. We wear a mask that keeps our true self hidden.
- We have no idea who we are and neither does anyone else.
- are you afraid of people thinking negatively about you?
- doing things you don't want to do?
- afraid to let people know how you really feel?
What kinds of boundaries are there?
Boundaries can involve our material possessions, homes, car, belongings. We also have emotional, physical, sexual, mental and spiritual boundaries.
Remember these key points:
- Allowing someone to cross our boundaries is self betrayal.
- When we don't set healthy boundaries and stand up for ourselves by self advocating we abandon the self.
- Setting boundaries makes the difference between a healthy functioning relationship and one where we will end up feeling resentful and angry when we do things we don't want to do.
- Your personal integrity and authenticity depends on you setting and keeping healthy boundaries.
- We need to be in touch with how we feel.
- Boundaries are all about your FEELINGS and emotions.
- Whenever we begin to change the way we govern ourselves, it can feel foreign and uncomfortable at first. Stepping into new territory can feel a little weird because it is different than what we are used to. This is normal. Often people who come from abusive backgrounds have challenges when they begin to move into new territory.
In 2012, I became self actualized and enlightened. What does that mean to you? It means I no longer take things personally, my ego is quiet and I come from a place of complete acceptance and love. I have done over 30 years of inner work and healing, study and recovery. I love myself completely. I am no longer anxious, depressed, lonely, worried or fearful. I can help you find your path. I am your spiritual pathfinder. I am the guide that you need. If you know someone that can benefit from this post, pass it on. You might be helping more than just one person, in this way.
The National Guild of Hypnotists.