Talk To Me!

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

On Sex

Sex allows us to experience ourselves fully. At the very core of who we are is our sexuality. Without sex, we are blocked, limited and not expressing ourselves as the beings we truly are. Sex is a spiritual experience. Thinking you are closer to God by not having sex is a limiting belief. Without sex, our creativity is blocked.

Finances may be challenging or almost nonexistent. Our sexual center is also the center for expressing ourselves out in the world. When we suppress our sexual self, we are repressed. Obsessions often result from a lack of sexual gratification.

I am looking for a response from you, my interested and faithful readers. I really appreciate you being here, reading my articles and commenting when you feel called to do so. I usually get guidance regarding the subjects I need to write about. However, I don't want to be speaking into a vacuum, or writing only about what I think you want to know. What do you want to hear about? What questions do you have? Is there a subject you want more information about - or something I have yet to discuss here? Please e-mail me with questions, subjects or any concern you have about your relationship, or sex life. I will write a generic article with your name withheld. 

My book, Orgasm For Life was written to be a guide to both men and women, for deeper understanding, conscious loving and sex for deeper intimacy and happier, healthier lives and relationships. Orgasm For Life helps both sexes come to a deeper understanding of each other's needs, emotionally and physically which helps sex to be better. You can find my books on Amazon.com 

AUTHOR'S SIDE NOTE:

No matter how evolved we become, we are always learning, growing and expanding, or we are dying. It is as simple as that. I hope you will check out my articles on Conscious Life News, and my videos on Digital Romance TV. I also have my own You Tube channel. 

I try my best to make what I write about count. If you have a subject you would like information about, I am open to your suggestions. I hope you will e-mail me your thoughts, concerns or questions. I am about to tape my first radio show on BBM GLOBAL RADIO. My show is called ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE. I hope you will check out this show and listen in. I am interested to hear what you want me to share, talk about and explore on the air. I am very interested in your feedback. This radio show is not about me, it is about YOU! ALL OF YOU! So please talk to me! Let me know what you need, how you are experiencing pain, challenges with relationships and sex. This radio show is for YOU, my readers to cover the bases you want more information and guidance about.

E-mail Jennifer Here: JenniferElizabethMaters@GMail.com

I am here to help you with your personal growth, challenges with what I have learned along my healing journey. I don't know everything, but I have experienced a lot. I have learned so much and continue to learn something every day. 

Shifting into sex and passion was a natural transition for me; someone who loves sex and who has healed addictions and codependency. In my book, Orgasm For Life I share what I

learned on my journey from sexual dysfunction to wholeness. I hope you'll read my books and discover your inner soul's purpose on your road to healing. And connect with me for deeper work, if you feel called.

Jennifer Elizabeth Masters now empowers women and men through her love and passion coaching. Using six modalities, the experience is different for every person. A lack of Self love is the source of all addictions.

Loving the self is the greatest gift you can give yourself and the world. You can e-mail Jennifer here for your personal 30 minute FREE discovery session to find out if her work is a good fit for you. 

How To Let Go Of Shame with Sex

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

Shame is one of the lowest vibrating emotions there is. David R. Hawkins author of Power vs Force calibrated each of the emotions using a scale. He found shame to be below anger, desire, fear and even grief. If you have ever felt shame, you know how debilitating it can be. If you have been molested, raped, gotten pregnant when you were not married, shame is something you are very familiar with. Shame is something that children feel when parents or teachers humiliate them. What if you felt shame each time you had sex? I recently worked with a client who came to me to help her heal her addiction to relationships - codependency. 

When I asked Cassie (name changed to protect her identity) what her intention was for her healing work she said, that's easy. "I want to heal my shame during sex, so that I feel comfortable in my own skin." Every time she had sex, she felt ashamed. She never could really let go and enjoy the experience, even though she was a mature woman. It was not a matter of her having to answer to anyone about her activity. This shame was felt internally, because of her past. 

By our third session, I knew I needed to clear patterns from the past. I performed a past life energy clearing. I felt intuitively that Cassie had 5 religious lifetimes where she had taken a vow of celibacy. I cleared each of these lifetimes separately. I did further research and found that Cassie had been a priest, a Jesuit priest and a nun three

times. The last lifetime, I found she had also been a Mother Superior. She had been married to the church. These vows were so deeply ingrained within her that she could not have sex now without feeling it was very wrong. I cleared the vow having her repeat a clearing statement. 

After the past life work, I heard intuitively that I needed to clear the trapped emotions. Following are the emotions related to this one emotion that was trapped underneath the feeling of shame:

Pride

Shame

Disgust

Jealousy

Self Hatred of sexual self

Abandonment

Rejection of self pleasure

Shame regarding pleasure

Low self esteem

Unworthy

Worthless

Discouragement

Failure to receive love

Cassie's happy place

After the release work, I set an anchor using Neuro Linguistic Programming. This anchor put Cassie in her happy place where she felt completely calm, secure, happy, confident and safe. Then I slowly reduced the sense of trauma and shame during sex. We had to do this process twice to be sure it was complete.  I asked Cassie what her take-away was at the end of session three this is what she said; "I am amazed that there were so many emotions stuck under these feelings of shame."

This past week we met for her fourth session. I had no idea what to expect. As usual, at the beginning of our session, I asked her how she was doing? She said, "Shifting." I asked her, "What do you mean, can you explain?" She said, "Well I have no more feelings of shame - at all! I feel completely comfortable with my sexuality!" I congratulated her on her deep letting go of the past. This was indeed amazing. I was thrilled for her. 

I am constantly amazed at the power of energy healing work. I have done traditional therapy myself with a psychiatrist, several times with psychologists and marriage counselors. In marriage counseling I found that if we went into counseling our marriage was over. I have never known any couple to really get help from marriage counseling. The therapists seemed to pit one against the other. It seemed to me that someone was often made to be the bad guy/gal. I did not move forward to a place of healing or well-being with any of these traditional therapies. Nothing really changed. I felt stuck in my story. 

Energy work on the other hand moves you out of the story and eliminates the patterns, belief systems and stuck emotions. How great is that! In only three weeks! I am grateful to Cassie for allowing me to share her amazing story. I am also grateful to The Divine, the angels and all the beings of light that assist me when I do this work. I do not do it alone. I always have assistance. 

Shifting into sex and passion was a natural transition for me; someone who loves sex and who has healed addictions and codependency. In my book, Orgasm For Life I share what I

learned on my journey from sexual dysfunction to wholeness. I hope you'll read my books and discover your inner soul's purpose on your road to healing. And connect with me for deeper work, if you feel called.

Jennifer Elizabeth Masters now empowers women and men through her love and passion coaching. Using six modalities, the experience is different for every person. A lack of Self love is the source of all addictions.

Loving the self is the greatest gift you can give yourself and the world. You can e-mail Jennifer here for your personal 30 minute FREE discovery session to find out if her work is a good fit for you. 

11 Easy Love Lessons For A Happier Life

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

Love and happiness are thought to go together. Many people believe that if they could just find someone that loved them they would be happy. I used to feel that way too. In fact, I felt that way so much that I was married and divorced four times! I didn't love myself. Instead I looked for someone else to love me! The problem is that when we don't love and accept ourselves, we are often resistant to love. We think we want it, but just as often we send it packing, by rejecting those who love us. We might not even feel loved by the other, because of our own resistance to love. We might further reject love by saying no in the bedroom, or withholding affection. When we don't love ourselves, our first two centers are often totally blocked. We don't feel safe, because we don't trust ourselves.

Many people are still in search of one or the other. I am here to tell you after searching for love over and over again, that happiness within, outweighs relational love every time, because our lives get better, we become happier, peace filled and full of joy! When we don't love and accept ourselves, our relationships are wrought with issues, challenges and conflict until we love ourselves completely. We are out of balance, often overly emotional, or triggered by others. Our lives are often filled with chaos, conflict and strife. We struggle with the simplest of things. Once we lovingly accept ourselves, with all the warts, wrinkles and flaws, relationships become easy. 

When we truly love and accept ourselves, we are happy just being. For me, I am happy whether I am with someone or alone. I am not looking for someone else to fill a void inside me, because there is no longer a void to fill. This is where real love abides. When we love ourselves above any other, love just shows up when we least expect it. When we are happy with ourselves and stop looking, love appears! I further posit that we can love anyone that we choose to love.

Once we are happy with ourselves, love just happens. 

Each of us has a story. We were born. We all had a family of origin. Many of us had parents who were dysfunctional on some level, with inadequacies and issues of their own. They did the best they could with what they were given by their parents. Many of us feel that our parents didn't love us enough or praise us enough, allowed us to experience trauma in some way. Everything that happens in our lives is created, to help us grow and evolve. Over the years, I have begun to see these experiences for the gift that they are, rather than the victimization of a child. We are all here on this earth for the same reason; to grow, evolve and become enlightened. Whether you are a believer in Divinty, Buddha, Mohamed, Jesus, or an altheist, we are all here for the same reason: PERSONAL GROWTH. 

1. Be Present!

Life is a gift and it is best lived by being present with each moment. When we focus on the past, regretting what we did or didn't do, we are stuck in the past. We can't live in the present always looking over our shoulder with regret. Recognize that you had an experience. Be grateful for it and the lesson you learned. You can always improve. Whether it is becoming a better lover, a kinder more compassionate person, or letting go of the hurt, pain, suffering and emotions from the past will help you be happier in the now. The same thing is true about living in the future. If you constantly wonder when will you meet your love, or when will you be happy, you never will. Breathe. Breathe again. Come back to what is happening in this moment. When we live in the future, we miss the joy of what is happening RIGHT NOW!

2. Stop Critisizing Others

When we attempt to fix or change others it is because we are not happy with ourselves. If you critisize others it means you are critical of yourself. Drop the magnifying glass and the baseball bat. When we beat others up, we also beat ourselves up as well. When we focus on flaws, flaws are

all we see. We all have flaws and faults. We are human. When we expect others to be perfect, we also are striving for perfection within ourselves. Instead of looking at everyone's flaws, focus on the good, everyone has good inside of them. Softening your perspective allowing you to be happy with you as you are, without having to lose 40 pounds or with the job you have now, with or without a partner, or with the partner you now have, will help you be happier. Many beleieve that happiness comes from some outside source. Happiness comes from you. It comes from you choosing it. Choosing to be happy with what you have. Happiness comes from self acceptance. Accept your children, lover, family and friends the way they are, rather than trying to make them BETTER, or trying to fix or change them. This is what life is all about. The more loving you are with yourself, the more loving and accepting you will be of others. The less you critisize others, the happier you will be with you. 

3. Let Go Of Needing To Be Right - Stop The Fight!

If you are fighting with others, you are in conflict with yourself ~ internally.  If you find yourself having arguments with everyone, you probably have some self righteous anger within you. Needing to be right comes from the ego self, rather than your heart-connected higher self. If you fight with your family members it is

because you have not resolved internal pain. You may be blaming others for the way you feel. 

Love is not about winning, it is about compromise and acceptance. We can't change anyone but ourselves. We can't make someone else do anything. We certainly can't change anyone but ourselves. 

Happiness is not about being right or trying to fix the world, or have everyone join you in your opinion or beliefs. Once you give up having to be right all the time, you will find conflicts cease. When you stop fighting with yourself, you will find yourself better able to get along with anyone. 

An elderly woman I interviewed recently told me that the way she would decide whether something was worth fighting with her husband over, she would ask herself, "Will this matter a bit in 5 years?" If the answer was no, she would choose to go make love with her husband instead. She said it was infinitely more fun than arguing. She is still happily married AND having regular sex into her 80's. Possible? - Yes it is!

4. Forgive Everyone  - And All Past Hurts and Let it GO!

I know many people that are continuing to tell their story of woe well into their 60's and beyond. Everyone has had challenges. Everyone has experienced hurts, grief and strife. Your parents,

lovers, ex's all did the best they could with what they were given and where they were at that time. Forgiving others sets you free. Hanging onto feelings of resentment or hatred for those who have wronged you only hurts you, not them. If you are estranged from your parents, siblings, children or ex's and feel hatred or resentment for any of them, you have hatred and resentment for yourself. Forgive yourself. Forgive everyone else too. Do the Ho'oponopono Prayer for yourself first and then for everyone who you have hurt or have hurt you. You will feel greatly relieved. 

Hanging onto hurts and resentment will eventually cause you illness and even cancer. 

5. Set An Intention For Your Life, Love, Relationship

An intention can give you purpose. Setting an intention causes you to move towards something. Once you set an intention, things have to change. You have sent it out to the Universe. Write it down. Writing your intention down makes it move into the material. In other words if you want something to materialize for you write it down. Don't know how to go about setting an intention? Follow the steps next:

Ask Yourself These Questions

There is no time like the present. Make an intention right now after you determine where you are now. Answer hese questions to determine where you want to go. This will help you focus and a assess how you feel right now. Write down the answers. These will shift after writing your intention.

1. Are you happy in your life, marriage, relationships, work?
2. What do you want for your life? 
3. What do you want for your family? 
4. What do you want in your love life? 
5. What do you want in a year from now? 
6. What are you passionate about? 
7. How do you want to serve humanity?

Write your intention based on what you now want for you and your life. For example: I intend to live my life to the fullest in love every day. 

6. Choose To Be Happy With YOU!

The magic of being happy with you!

Happiness does not happen by waving a wand. We have to choose it. How do we do that? We begin thinking positive thoughts. We stop beating ourselves and others up. We stop looking for someone else to do it for us. We take responsibility for our own happiness and health.

If you aren't happy with you, you won't be happy with anything else either. So many of the women that I work with come to me right after a break-up because they are not happy. Many think that if they have a relationship they will be happy. This is something I can speak about from experience. I have been married four times. I used to look for love in others. I was wanting someone to make me happy. I thought when I got married I will surely be happy then! Not so. The reason is that everywhere we go, we show up as ourselves. 

Until we are happy with us we won't be happy with anyone else either. Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

7. Take Responsibility For Your Health - MOVE!

When you love yourself you take responsibility for your health. Getting exercise, eating healthy foods and feeling and releasing our emotions is all part of our personal responsibility. We can't blame others for the way we feel, anymore than we can blame others for our poor health. 

Humans were created to be mobile. We used to walk to gather nuts, berries, and the beasts that we hunted. Today most people sit at a computer for hours without moving. Our bodies are healthier when we move, walk or exercise. This does not mean you have to take up

running. Walking is good exercise. Swimming is excellent exercise. Walking in hip deep water can give you a good work out. When we sit without moving our joints become stiff, we begin to feel old. A lack of physical movement can cause constipation and other issues. Along with movement the food that we feed our body will either support us and keep us healthy, or create illness and obesity. The more we love ourselves, the better care we take of our body and health.

Our attitude about life effects everything. If we beleive we are getting old we will age faster than those who continue to think young. Aging gracefully does not mean you have to become old. That is a false premise. My mother is 94, although she doesn't look like she is 40, she still reads 6 books a week, drives a car, lives alone, cooks for herself and is healthy. She used to exercise in front of her television with Jack LaLane for years. Only two years ago she received her Curves 100 t-shirt for attending 100 work-outs in a row. Moving will keep you young and vibrantly

healthy. Get a dog and walk your dog three times a day. My dogs keep me active and walking regularly even when I don't want to, or the weather isn't optimum.

Until I took responsibility for my own health and happiness, I did not become happy with me. Once I did, the relationship although nice to have was no longer my primary focus. I was totally happy with myself, no matter where I lived, no matter whether I was alone or in relationship. That is true happiness. It is not dependent on another, a place or a thing. Lasting happiness comes from you choosing it, every single day. Happiness is an attitude, a shift of perspective.

8. GRATITUDE AND THE LAW OF ATTRACTION

Gratitude is what fuels your creation. If you aren't grateful for what you have now, nothing good will flow to you with ease. Gratitude opens our hearts. Gratitude puts us in the place of love, where manifestation becomes easy. Gratitude alone can raise your vibration faster than anything I know. When we feel sorry for ourselves, we are wallowing in self pity. Shift your attitude to gratitude and begin saying prayers of thanks for the smallest of things. If you are penniless, be grateful the ease and speed that money flows to you. If you don't have your health, begin saying prayers of gratitude for your vibrant health and see how things shift for you. When we focus on being grateful amazing things happen. The Universe supports us, gratitude is the gift we give in return. 

My personal experience with wallowing in self pity and focusing on what I didn't have shifted almost immediately when I began to write in a journal every day. I began to script for my life. I wrote the things that I wanted as if they were already present in the material. It only took days for money to begin to come in. I wrote about how grateful I was for the four new clients. Before long, I realized that I already had four new clients! Within three weeks my life shifted in a very big way. 

We have to be happy and grateful for the car, the roof over our

heads, our ability to pay our bills and our paycheck. If we aren't grateful for these things we likely focus on what we don't have. Focusing on what we don't have nets your more of what you aren't happy with. Instead of focusing on the outward appearance or your current circumstances, focus on the good. 

TO MANIFEST LOVE

If you want love in your life, begin saying "Thank you for the love in my life!" "Thank you for the loving, respectful honoring relationship I now have." This will put what you desire into your energy field. Focusing on being alone will keep you alone.

ASK: I have found that asking questions nets the fastest response, especially when we ask for something that will be a win-win solution for more people than just us. For example:

HOW CAN I EFFORTLESSLY AND EASILY FIND THE PERFECT JOB FOR THE PERFECT PAY?

HOW CAN I EFFORTLESSLY AND EASILY HAVE ________?

9. Daily Meditation - Spiritual Connection

Meditation connects you to the infinite field of potential. It helps to reset your energy. It can shift you from feeling angry, sad or even depressed. Meditation makes everything in your day go better. It helps you focus and gain clarity. It also connects you to your Divine self. 

I teach my clients how to meditate. Even those who say they can't or never have been able to quiet their minds, I help them do just that. Meditation allows you to connect with all that is. Remember: You are able to tap into the limitless field of potential through this simple daily activity. 

10. Play

Life is really a game. When you learn how to play it, everything becomes play. Life is short have a ball! Have fun with it. Most people have forgotten how to play. Connecting with our inner child helps us do just that. Watch a child. They know how. Play can happen in the bedroom, during sex, you can find yourself laughing rather than taking yourself so seriously. I laugh at my goofiness all the time. When we can laugh at ourselves, life becomes so much easier. Laughter is healing. Laughter raises your

vibration. If you don't remember how to play watch a comedian like Bill Burr, or Jim Gaffigan. They laugh at themselves all the time. Laughter is good for the soul. Play is the way to get you there. 


11. Watch What You Say Feel and Believe

We are infinite creators. The Universe is always and in every way working for our good. If we say and believe, "LIFE IS HARD." The Universe will make it so - proving you right. If we say, "I don't have enough money for this." You will continue having not enough money for anything. Instead think carefully before you think. If you are envious of others, it is because you feel life isn't fair. However, you have created your life through your words, thoughts and beliefs. Be happy for others that are happy, or you will never be happy yourself. Be happy for others' successes. Or you will never be successful. Be happy for those that have wealth and money, or you will never have it yourself. You can't hate what you desire, or you will continue to keep it from yourself. You are in conflict in this way.

When we begin feeling we are enough, that we have enough and as a matter of fact, we are the energy of money, we begin to have more than enough. Everything is energy. Our thoughts are energy. Our emotions are energy. When we have a thought coupled with a

strong emotion - we attract whatever we were thinking about ~whether it is positive or negative. Everything is energy; therefore money is energy, love is energy, you are energy! Here are some positive ways to attract what you desire:

• I am love
• I am money
• I am the energy of money
• I am wealth
• I am the consciousness of success
• I am the consciousness of profit
• I am the consciousness of money
• I attract what I am
• Therefore I am love
• I am loving
• I love me
• I love you

Thoughts become things. Watch what you think. Watch how you feel. Notice what your thoughts are. The more we focus on something the more of it we attract, whether we want it or not.

My Personal Journey and Lessons:
I was traumatized early in childhood. I had people I loved and trusted cross personal boundaries, victimize and molest me. I felt unloved, unworthy and worthless. This caused a fracture in my soul. Until I did deep energy work with soul retreival, and released trapped and stuck emotions I felt lost, broken and ungrounded. This is now part of the work I do with my clients. I healed my own addictions through loving me and finding my spiritual purpose here on earth. As simple as that coupled with a deep spiritual grounding, my illness, depression, anxiety and addictions were all healed. Without the spiritual we are lost and feel alone. Daily meditation is what keeps me connected, focused and clear.

The happier I became with me, the better all my relationships were. Instead of fighting with my mother and children, there is ease and peace between us. Happiness became a permanent emotion. 

Sex became better. There was laughter during love making! My Tantra healing allowed me to become fully orgasmic. Until that time, orgasms were difficult if not impossible without manual stimulation. I knew I was not alone, which is why I was guided to write Orgasm For Life. If I had difficulties with orgasmic after sexual trauma, there were others that did too. 

I share my own personal experiences openly as well as my lessons. Many people can relate to what I have been through. Others did not share the same experiences, yet we cannot judge anyone else, because when we do, we also judge ourselves. Until we walk in another person's shoes we never know why they did what they did, or why they have the experiences they do. Each of us is here to grow and evolve. We do this by having experiences. None of these things is wrong or bad, it just is. Allowing others to have their own experience without judgment is loving. 

Shifting into sex and passion was a natural transition for me; someone who loves sex and who has healed addictions and codependency. In my book, Orgasm For Life I share what I

learned on my journey from sexual dysfunction to wholeness. I hope you'll read my books and discover your inner soul's purpose on your road to healing. And connect with me for deeper work, if you feel called.

Jennifer Elizabeth Masters now empowers women and men through her love and passion coaching. Using six modalities, the experience is different for every person. A lack of Self love is the source of all addictions. Loving the self is the greatest gift you can give yourself and the world. You can e-mail Jennifer here for your personal 30 minute FREE discovery session to find out if her work is a good fit for you. 

G-Spot Fact or Fiction?

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

Thank you to Trojan for this photo

Videos of a women experiencing ejaculatory orgasms are extolled on porn sites, and even You Tube. Many self-respecting women hear about these gushing orgasms and question what the fuss is all about. "Why on earth would I want one?", they wonder. Porn stars have them, but should a wife and mother want to have them too?

Those who have had them say the experience brings them to a state of utter satisfaction and profoundly deepens the connection they share with their partners. So how does one have them?

Typically, these kinds of orgasms are linked to stimulation of the G-spot, an area of the female anatomy that has garnered a near mythical status over the last six decades. While science has been slow to prove what every woman who has been stimulated there knows (that it's very real!), we finally have at least a case study demonstrating its existence.

The G-Spot is a pleasure center approximately the size of a quarter, located 1 to 2.5 inches inside the vaginal opening, on the upper interior wall, towards the belly button. It is in close proximity, albeit internally located centimeters from the sensitive clitoris. With one curled upward facing finger, the G-Spot is within every woman's reach. So why do so many women have difficulty finding it?

The main reason is this: the G-Spot is extremely sensitive to pressure, so most women react to the initial discomfort and stop the stimulation. Because it's comprised of erectile tissue, the G-spot has a ribbed texture like a washboard, and the first touch of this sensitive area creates a strong urge to urinate. Most women experience this feeling and don't push through the initial discomfort.

As a women, there are two things you can do to move through this initial stage more easily: empty your bladder before sex play, and bear down towards the pressure when you feel it. Beyond this urge to pee awaits immense, deeply profound waves of pleasure that can last minutes and create an ejaculatory orgasm. This is why the G-spot is often referred to as the "woman's prostate."

The G-Spot, named after Dr. Ernst Gräfenberg who discovered this extremely sensitive area in 1950, has been the source of much myth and debate since then. Although a very sensitive area was also discussed in The Kama Sutra as early as 1100 that led to intense, multiple orgasms, some medical doctors still deny it's existence to this day.

A recent study by Dr. Amichai Kilchevsky, a urology resident at Yale-New Haven Hospital in Connecticut determined  “Without a doubt, a discreet anatomic entity called the G-spot does not exist.”  Dr. Kilchevsky did his testing in a sterile laboratory with bright lights and cameras. No wonder the women tested could not become aroused enough for the erectile tissue of the G-spot to be engorged, or felt!

It's important to remember that just because something hasn't been found, does not mean it doesn't exist. It simply means it hasn't yet been found. Early maps of our world left off whole islands and even continents, simply because they hadn't yet been discovered.

Biologist, Zoe Cormier, believes the G-spot is real and shares this in her Huffington Post interview:

"I don't think it's a myth, and I read an entire book about it. Beverly Whipple at Rutgers has devoted pretty much 30 years to studying this thing. I don't think there is any way that that kind of body of research could be created if it wasn't real. I don't think that all women necessarily have one, but it does seem that it's a sort of cluster of tissue that can grow in size as you age, and the more you use it, the more it grows, just like any muscle."

Women, when you stimulate your G-spot, it becomes awakened and enlarged. Usually 20 minutes of arousal is enough for you to feel the swollen ribbed area on the upper wall. Prior to stimulation, the G-spot is flat because it is not engorged or erect. Like a man prior to being aroused, the G-spot needs some TLC to perform.

Anxiety, failure to focus, or an inability to relax, can all cause arousal issues. And this may explain why the G-spot has been so elusive over the years -- especially in scientific settings. Without the ability to be present and focused on the sex act, many women just don't get turned on enough for the G-Spot to appear. Often, they may just be beginning to reach this point of arousal when the coitus experience ends, due to their partner's orgasm.

What is needed in these cases is to extend the act of foreplay longer, and to massage the G-spot a while longer prior to penetration. Using a curled finger, massaging with pressure in a come hither motion intensifies the sensitivity of this area. The G-spot can also be reached in coitus, but that obviously takes more expertise. Russell Brand quips in his Netflix Special, Messiah Complex, that you need a special upward stroke of the penis to be able to "get the G-spot off!"

Here's my explanation of that. As the man's penis begins to swell right before ejaculation, women often begin to feel the benefits of this increase in girth, which naturally begins to put pressure on the G-spot. If the man can hold off his own orgasm, he may be able to stimulate his partner's G-spot with an upward stroke. Pulling back to the point of almost exiting the vagina and taking short strokes through penetrating thrusts instead of deep thrusting, will stimulate the G-spot.

Personally I believe that every woman with a vagina has a G-spot. It may be dormant, but that does not mean it doesn't exist. As women age, this area becomes larger and more sensitive the more it is stimulated. So ladies, this means you can actually develop your G-spot like any other muscle simple by stimulating it yourself and also by getting your partner to engage in more pre-coital stimulation. Yes, if it's desired, female ejaculation can become a regularly occurring phenomenon for any woman.

I find that women who have been through sexual trauma may first need to undergo some gentle release work to eliminate the cellular trauma that is stored in the G-spot.  The movie Bliss, with Terrance Stamp as the Tantrika healer, details the issues related to sexual trauma and G-spot dysfunction. It isn't that women don't have a G-spot, but the fact that trauma is often stored in the erectile tissue which causes a lack of orgasmic release. Tantric healing massage is explained in detail in my book, Orgasm For Life ~ Sexual Healing.

Here are instructions for how to locate and stimulate the G-Spot:

1) Place a towel or two beneath her buttocks, comfortably. When the G-Spot releases there may be a considerable amount of Amrita released. This is not urine. The liquid comes from the Skene's Glands, not the bladder.

2) While performing oral sex add an additional motion of an upward turned finger stroking, putting pressure on the ribbed area on the upper wall of the vagina.

3) Stroking toward yourself in a "come hither" motion, add some gentle pressure, massaging the quarter sized ribbed area.

4) When you are massaging the G-Spot, you will notice the area swelling and becoming engorged as it is stimulated. The G-Spot is composed of erectile tissue, like the penis.

5) There will most likely be a feeling or urge to urinate.

6) Empty your bladder.

7) Returning to the stimulation, bear down or move towards the pressure.

8) Continue stroking, massaging the G-Spot.

9) Breathe, open your mouth as it relaxes the vagina.

10) Allow yourself to enjoy the stimulation and let go of the need to think about anything but the pleasure you are experiencing. Focus on the pleasure. If it becomes too intense breathe through your mouth, do your best to relax and let go. Move towards the pleasure.

11) Allow yourself to flow into the feelings of ecstasy. Relax. Follow the pleasure.

Shifting into sex and passion was a natural transition for me; someone who loves sex and who has healed addictions and codependency. In my book, Orgasm For Life I share what I

learned on my journey from sexual dysfunction to wholeness. I hope you'll read my books and discover your inner soul's purpose on your road to healing. And connect with me for deeper work, if you feel called.

Jennifer Elizabeth Masters now empowers women and men through her love and passion coaching. Using six modalities, the experience is different for every person. Self love is the source of all addictions. Loving the self is the greatest gift you can give yourself and the world. You can find additional resources on her blog, Love Yourself Fearlessly.

How Denying Pleasure Can Lead To Breast Cancer

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

Since the dawn of time women have been programmed to take care of another's needs. It is in our DNA. We are taught at an early age to cook good food for our families, be loving caretakers of our children and partners, putting everyone's needs above our own. Pleasing others is deeply programmed

into the core of our being, often to our own detriment. The problem is while we are so busy taking care of other's needs, we deny our own. We might stew over resentment and don't resolve anger, grief or loss. These emotions left unresolved become a molten brew for future cancer.

Best selling healer and author, Louise Hay writes in You Can Heal Your Body, that cancer is caused by, "Deep hurt. Longstanding resentment. Deep secret or grief eating away at the self. Carrying hatred or a belief, of "What's the use." I cannot tell you how many of my clients that have kept a rape or childhood sexual molestation a secret for decades and now have cancer. Louise Hay's work may be the most instrumental book that helped me heal my own breast cancer. We have to learn to let go of our emotions, forgive everyone, rather than being ruled and sickened by our thoughts and emotions.

Many women don't recognize that this lack of self nurturing is also the root cause of breast cancer. A refusal to nurture the self is the underlying cause of breast cancer. It is time to change this painful paradigm for women. We need to re-frame our version of happiness. Our lives don't have to be perfect for us to be happy.

Wake-up calls happen in various forms. Divorce, depression, loss of our job, or serious health issues occur when we refuse to see the truth in our being. If we don't receive or notice the gentle taps on our shoulder by the universe, we are given stronger signs. Women come to me when their suffering is so great, or they shocked to discover they have cancer. They know that self-love is the path to health and well-being. 

Healing from the inside out has to occur to uproot the cause of cancer. Cutting it out, applying chemotherapy or irradiating can only remove the symptom, not the cause. Often this form or "curing," is worse than the disease itself. I have lost more than one dear friend to chemotherapy, rather than from cancer. To truly heal, we need to remove what is often called in hypnotherapy, "the forcing function."

Suffering is a forcing function. When we gripe, moan or complain we are suffering. When we rage and stew in our anger, we are suffering. When we say no to pleasure we cause ourselves to suffer. When we resist love, joy or happiness by being stuck in our beliefs we suffer. Women need to say yes to life and in so doing open to receive pleasure. 

Surrender is the path to joy and happiness. Resistance is the path of suffering. We have to choose for ourselves to affirm life. Women with a low sense of self-worth don't breathe deeply. Their breath is shallow. Breathing deeply is affirming life. When we breathe in deeply we then begin to recognize

our value and our personal power. Each of us has this personal value and power, we just don't recognize it when we are fighting with life. We are the ones that undermine our own sense of self. We are also the ones that can shift that paradigm with simply a change of perspective.

How often have you heard, "We are our own worst enemy?" Are you? What is your self talk like? Do you encourage yourself in your mind? Or do you beat yourself up for all your failures. We are the ones who create our suffering. No one else does it to us. We may be in an abusive relationship, however we are there by our own choosing. We have drawn

this situation to us by what our energy is emitting into the universe. The higher we vibrate, we attract higher vibrating people and relationships. The lower we vibrate, the lower the people and situations we attract. We have the power to change everything. Instead of hating yourself, begin to speak gently, lovingly and compassionately to yourself. Encourage you. Love you. Give to and nurture you.

We often say no to sex because we are tired, bitchy or just don't want to be bothered. Or maybe we don't feel like "giving" to our husband or partner because of something they have said or done. When we choose no, we are denying ourselves pleasure as well. When we say no, we are in resistance. We are staving off our joy. We may lay awake

unable to sleep afterwards, angry at our partner and ourselves, wondering why we didn't say "Yes!" instead? We could have been receiving pleasure or had an orgasm and now be fast asleep. We do it to ourselves unconsciously. We create our own heaven or hell.

How many moments of bliss have you denied yourself? Can you even count them? The only way to change a behavior is to recognize the pattern, (raising awareness consciously) and choosing differently. When we shine the light of awareness on a situation it cannot stay the same, it has to change. Choosing differently and consistently, will over time, repattern the brain. The synapses will change your brain, programming it for pleasure instead of a lack of it. How long does it take to change a habit? Depending on how consistently you choose differently, as little as two months for some, or as long as 66 days for others. The more focused on changing your behavior you are, the better your success at doing so. If you know the alternative could be something health depriving, that should be enough to motivate you, don't you think?

Pleasure can be experienced in so many ways. Sometimes, we have been so busy living, struggling to keep our head above water that we feel we don't have time for it. Rushing through life, hanging on for dear life is not living in the moment. Instead of thinking "I don't have time," create the time. Change your belief to "I have plenty of time." You can even use one of my manifesting secrets I share with my private clients: ask the universe questions. 

The universe will always make you right. Whether it is positive or negative. Instead of having the belief that there isn't enough time, "How can I effortlessly and easily have plenty of time for pleasure?" Questions are a powerful tool for creating more joy and happiness in your life. They can shift your perspective from wasting time to being more efficient. How much time do you waste with tasks that don't net any positive rewards? How much time do you spend reading meaningless e-mails or writing on Facebook to people you don't even know?

Take a walk out in nature all by yourself. Luxuriate in a hot bath tub with your favorite oil, or Epsom salts. Take time to experience the beauty in life. Take time out for you. Nurture you. Care for you. As my mother used to ask me, when I was strung out on life, "Who is going to take care of you, if you don't?" Begin to say yes to new experiences instead of an

automatic, "NO!" Have a date with your partner. Experience the joy of just being. Slow down and breathe. Often we are so busy doing that we forget to be. The housework will always be there. The laundry will always need to be done. Letting go of the perfection of each task can free you to be yourself. Face it, you will never be perfect, why not be happy with good enough?

Although people come to me with a variety of issues, every one of my clients came to me with an issue of perfectionism. I understand it well. I used to be the same way. If I could amass the cost of burned meals and ruined pots I have created by being engrossed in my writing, I could probably own Farberware by now. I have let go of trying to be perfect. I am very happy with me as I am. If people can't accept that, is

their issue not mine. We have to recognize that we are killing ourselves by trying to be perfect. The perfect mother, perfect wife, perfect body or face and perfect housekeeper. We are so obsessed with perfection that women are actually having their vaginas and labia reconstructed to make it more "perfect!" 

When are we going to be happy just being us, the way we are? Our obsession with perfection is causing anxiety, low self-esteem and teens to get breast implants. We set the tone for our daughter's self-esteem. When we are happy with ourselves, our children will be happier as a result. Happiness is an inside job. Pleasure is on the path to surrendering into being the beautiful you, that you already are.

Jennifer Elizabeth Masters is a love and passion coach, author and healer. Check out her blog: Love Yourself Fearlessly. She empowers women and the men who love them to love themselves fearlessly. She works with women who are ready to be happy with their lives and need a little leg up. She gives her clients the tools to use in their personal lives long after the coaching experience ends. Jennifer's own journey has equipped her with a deep compassion for others' suffering, depression, anxiety, relationship, sexual challenges and health issues.

When Jennifer began her healing journey she recognized that her negative thoughts were killing her and that she was the common denominator in all her failed relationships. She helps women move out of victimhood, codependence, addictions and suffering into a life of joy, pleasure and bliss on all levels. Jennifer is certified in hypnotherapy, NLP, life

coaching and reads the Akashic Records. 

She is a natural catalyst, meaning just being in her presence - even on the phone, will shift you, bringing up your issues to be released. Jennifer is a Master energy healer who works with your energy field to remove deep trapped beliefs, emotions and blocks so that you can live your life empowered, free and joyful. She is the author of two books, Odyssey Victim To Victory, the story of her recovery and life, and Orgasm For Life, the guide to bliss and understanding for both sexes. You can e-mail the author here.