By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters
Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale are divorcing after 13 years of marriage. They have three sons together. Rumors have surfaced, that like Ben Affleck, Gavin Rossdale has cheated.
I don't usually comment on the tabloids or hollywood divorce. With two famous couples recently filing for divorce, many are questioning if true love exists. Of course it does. If a commitment is made to be monogamous and one of the parties (men in both cases) are unfaithful, it can be a very difficult event to get over. In fact, the hurt and betrayal can be so great that the women can't imagine overcoming it. You can see the pain on Gwen's face in this photo taken yesterday. I feel for her and their children.
Ben Affleck aparently had an affair with their 28-year-old nanny. The betrayal is as bad as Arnold Schwartzenegger with their
housekeeper. Under their wives nose in their own bed.
|Ben Affleck picutured with Christine Ouzounian - nanny|
When you love someone and they are unfaithful, the pain is intense. You feel rejection, abandonment, betrayal and grief all at the same time. For me it was the end of my marriage in each case. The truth is it can't be hidden. The truth will come out.
I knew every time I was cheated on. Our gut tells us. We may hear a rumour, but our gut never lies. I have to say, I had a nanny when my second son was born in England. I was careful to pick someone that was young, innocent with strong morals. The girl that we had was Australian, sweet as can be. After my son was born, I had a little concern because I was getting my post-partum body back in shape. It can be a tough time emotionally for women. Hormones are raging, their breasts are full, new baby and a nanny.
Marriage can be challenging. Add three children, and fame none of us really know what happened. We can only speculate. It isn't any of our business. It is sad to see a bright shiny couple happily married successfully for years. When their marriage ends, we can feel disappointment, thinking that this in some way reflects on the love that we desire.
Cheating happens but not all men cheat. Not all women cheat either. Having opportunity many men will venture into the unknown territory because of the thrill while their brain shuts off. Scientifically speaking their conscience flies out the window. My aunt who was a very stiff Englishwoman and medical doctor had a phrase that spoke to men's desire to cheat, "A standing cock has no conscience." They may not feel regret until it is too late.
Often men who were previously distant will begin showering you with gifts after an affair to asage their conscience.
Jennifer Elizabeth Masters is a love and passion coach and author of Orgasm For Life.