Martyrdom is one of the seven basic character flaws or dark personality traits. When feelings of worthlessness are dominant a strong feeling of being a victim is also present. A parent or role model for you in early childhood, can imprint you also with these same character traits. This is one pattern that I am very familiar with. My mother was and still remains a victim.
condemns them. They are never good enough, because she never feels good enough. At church she often tells parishioners that what they are wearing does not match. She is always trying to "help" other people improve, because she feels so worthless.
- Do not take responsibilities for actions.
- When you bring up a victim's actions to them, they become extremely reactive and emotional.
- Victims blame others for the results of our own actions.
- Victims adopt some type of mechanism (anger, illness, upset, reactivity) that is clearly avoidance for the situation.
- Victims wallow in self pity. Why doesn't anyone like me?No one visits me.
- Victims thrive on drama and may be addicted to it.
- Victims are addicted to their pain and suffering.
- Victims have very low feelings of self esteem, unworthiness and feelings of not being loveable.
- Give too much to others, even when not asked and then feel taken advantage of and not appreciated.
- Wants to be liked by friends, family and community and therefore will volunteer to do everything in order to be accepted.
- Looking for love in all the wrong places, outside of themselves. Relationships will be very challenging while living in victimhood.
- Addictions, spending, relationships, substance is often present.
- Codependency figures prominently.
- Victims often attract vicimizers, because of the internal thoughts that are a beacon into the universe. Our thoughts bring back to us what we think and feel. If we feel we are a victim, the universe will agree, you most certainly are: her you go!
honest, loving and compassionate. I understand where her patterns come from. Miracles happen. I have not given up on her.
and felt lost and isolated in my marriages. When my partners would come to me to discuss situations, I would become reactive.
shadowy parts of your personality that have not been dealt with, will be shown very clearly to you. It it time to heal these dark character flaws and love your life. Believe me you will be so much happier when you do.
What People Say About Jennifer
Jennifer coached me from a place of darkness despair and depression. After a horrible codependent relationship and nastry breakup, I was lost and felt I needed a relationship to feel whole. Jennifer guided me to wait to date. I followed her advice. I now am in a loving, supportive relationship instead of one that was debilitating and abusive. CM Los Angeles
Jennifer Masters has remotely cleared several members of my family. One case in particular has been both subtle and profound in the positive changes that have occurred. I am grateful for her power and dedication.JLI, Denver