Everyone Is Codependent At Some Point; You Are Not Alone

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

Our need to be loved is an all pervasive one that prevails until the day we die. When we are born, we are totally dependent on our parents for food, care, nurturing and love. If we didn't get everything we needed as infants and children, our need for love, nurturing and validation continues. 

Ultimately, the reason why love and compassion bring us the greatest happiness is simply that our nature cherishes them above all else. Dali Lama

Love is the core of our being. It results from an interdependence on one another. Interdependence is the foundational law of nature. It isn't just higher forms of intelligence that rely on each other. Insects rely on communities to survive. The smallest of insects are social beings; it is through interconnectedness and working together that they survive.

Humans need an interconnection with others to survive. Think of the mighty oceans, rivers and streams, clouds, forests, and plants that surround us are all interdependent upon others to survive. Even those that are mightily independent need the support of others at the end of their lives and at times of great sadness or illness. 

The requirement for love continues as children grow. Children need to be held, nurtured and loved they grow up or mental and emotional difficulties result, which can cause challenges throughout their lives. A lifetime of emotional hardship results when children grow up with addicted parents, or are abused or molested which creates depression, numbness and low self-esteem, even sex addiction, which is so sad. Many children feel angry because of their mistreatment, but don't know what to do with this anger. 

When they show up in school, teachers nurture and assist these children growing up. So many children are growing up in broken homes, losing parents or without love and emotional support. In many households, technology is the babysitter. Televisions and cell phones with games do not provide the nurturing, acceptance and love that human contact and hugs do. We see mothers in grocery stores with a cell phone stuck to their heads ignoring the needs of their crying children. 

Our children need us to love them. Borderline Personality is created by abandonment issues, left untreated cause distress on the entire family unit.

Since we are so dependent on others, we need love, compassion and a sense of responsibility and genuine concern for the welfare of others. We aren't machines without feelings. We can't be filled and contented with material goods, wealth, and success alone. It is our interconnectedness that gives us our feelings of security and sense of belonging. 

We need each other. We all need love. We all must love ourselves first, to be happy in the world and relationship with others. Remember when you are out in the world today and always to smile at yourself and others. Each person in our world is a part of the whole. 

We are all interconnected. It doesn't matter if you live in Russia, Denmark, France, the UK, Israel, The United Emirates or the US. I reach out to all of you today and give you a group hug. Thank you for being here. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for being you in the world. I love you all!

Getting to know ourselves, loving and accepting us first is the cornerstone of a healthy society and planet. We all need to love and accept ourselves completely. We all need happiness and harmony. 

Spend some time today sitting in quiet. Think about all the wonderful qualities that you have. What gifts do you share with the world? How are you unique and special? Be grateful for who you are and what you have right now.

Ask yourself the following questions:

1. What are ten things you love about you?
2. What are ten things you love to do?
3. What are you passionate about?
4. What brings you happiness?
5. How can you nurture and love yourself on a daily basis?

You matter. You are worthy. You are deserving. You are loved. Use the following mantras to shift your focus inward towards loving thoughts and feelings. Allow these mantras to float through your consciousness into your unconscious mind while you perform mundane tasks.

I AM LOVED

I AM SAFE

I AM SECURE

Give gratitude for your talent, the exceptional parts of you that are unique and different. Each one of us is part of the whole community that makes up this planet. Your qualities are different than anyone else. There is a reason for our differences. We need you here. You are a part of this community. You play a big part on this earth. 

5 Simple Ways To Cure Anxiety

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Looking For A Healthy Balanced Love?

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

What Do Kobe Bryant, Tiger Woods and Marilyn Monroe Have In Common?

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

Kobe Bryant, Tiger Woods, Marilyn Monroe, Elle MacPherson and so many other greats all have coaches. They did not get to where they are in life going it alone. You know why? Because it is impossible to see what we are doing for ourselves. Only when another points out what could improve our score, swing, acting, or life can we improve. Everyone needs a coach to improve, including me. I did not get here all by myself. I had masters, teachers and gurus who taught me everything they knew.

I have recently been captivated by Marilyn Monroe's story. Born Norma Jean, her mother was taken from her and put into a mental institution. Like my mother, without the love of a mother or father, we develop deep insecurities and even mental instability. In my case, I had a mother, but she was horribly damaged from being an orphan at 5. She could not love unconditionally, praise or support her children in a healthy way. Many of us have had traumatic childhoods. These patterns can be shifted, removed and new patterns created which shift the DNA, permanently. 

Crazed and Chaotic?

How do I know, because I did it. I felt absolutely crazy into my late 30's. Early abuse left me damaged, shame filled, guilt ridden and broken. I felt shattered and ugly. I had an addictive personality, craving and looking for love through sex, that left me further broken and empty. 

What I have come to know is that parts of our soul shatter like glass when intense situations impact us, that we can't handle. These soul fragments splinter and fly off into the ethers. Sounds incredible, but it is true. As a result our chakra system becomes blocked, we develop health issues which plague us until patterns are cleared and removed. I have worked with thousands of traumatized people with PTSD, abuse and other traumas that this is like a miracle for their soul.

Norma Jean had to have help. If it wasn't anti-depressants, sleeping pills, wake-up pills, she had a team of people who cajoled, encouraged and kept her on track. Without these people, Marilyn would not ever have been the star that she was. They did not help her heal, but they kept her together so that she could do her movies. They told her how to look, talk, stand, walk. Marilyn was far more intelligent than most people remember. She felt broken.

Pain, unhappiness, depression and suffering don't have to be a part of your life experience. How do I know? I used to be depressed. For over 20 years I suffered from severe depression, insomnia, irrational fears, body pain, Fibromyalgia an auto- immune disease and chaos in my inner world. I overreacted when people made simple comments and took everything personally. I was a prickly pear, hard to love. I was so blocked and resistant to love, because I hated myself. I thought I loved myself, but that was my over-compensating EGO, that helped me (so my ego thought) to feel better. I couldn't accept love if it was delivered on a silver platter, which many times it was.

I changed my life a little at a time. I took anti-depressants and almost killed myself falling asleep at the wheel while on prozac. I drove 3 exits past my work before I woke up enough to realize I had gone too far! I stopped taking prozac, because I knew it was killing me. I got off Benadryl, when I was able to stop the worry and endless mind chatter. I began to do work I absolutely loved to do, that fulfilled me. In my school days, I was thought to be a slow learner. I always had comments on my report cards, "Can do better." What changed?

I began to tap into a higher power. I began to hear God's voice and that of my guides. My higher self also became evident and permanently connected and grounded within me. I meditated regularly. For over 8 years I have meditated twice a day. My mind chatter left when I had consistent meditation practice. But I had spiritual teachers, gurus and spiritual masters who guided me. I paid big bucks for classes and certifications so that I could heal myself. I have experienced deep states of bliss, called satori which changed me permanently. 

How have I gotten more wise, calm and peaceful? Through consistent hard work and spiritual practice. If an issue came up and I reacted to it, I asked myself tough questions. I looked within for answers. I followed guidance. As each relationship ended, I did personal analytics. I was not afraid to look at my own issues. When men lied to me and cheated on me, I asked myself, "Where do I lie to me? How do I cheat myself?' It took time, effort and consistency. I sometimes took one step forward and three steps back.

Doing Away With Fear

My fears subsided. All my life I had been incredibly fearful. Suddenly I realized I had no more fear. My deep spiritual connection and love for myself shifted EVERYTHING. I stopped trying to control my children, or anyone else. 

Control

We try to control our environment and others when we are afraid. These fears are usually grounded in the past from a traumatic event which imprinted you with this fear. All fears can be healed. Manipulation is a part of control. Manipulation is dishonest. It comes from not being authentic, lying about who you are. You are afraid to ask outright for what you want, so you manipulate to get it instead. Believe me I know, I was the Queen of Manipulators. We can't possibly be happy when we are inauthentic, controlling or manipulating. All these behaviors lead to a disruption in your energetic field.

Healing All Relationships

My relationship with my mother and everyone else was healed like magic, when I stepped into my authentic self and personal power. Instead of being the person others wanted me to be, I became authentically me. I could get my point across with a soft voice, no yelling to be heard or listened to. Without healing your past, you can't have a happy future. This is what I help others with. Even those who say they have done inner child work, or healed relationships with family, if you are not living the life of love, joy and happiness, your relationships have not been healed. It is not possible to live a life of joy and bliss everyday when you are holding resentment or anger towards anyone for the past.

Anger

If you experience road rage, eruptive or explosive anger, are quick to anger or get upset, you have healing to do. Until you have let go and healed the past, these issues will continue to plague you. For men, you probably had HTP, or premature ejaculation. 

Anger has a purpose. There is a difference between being angry because someone wants to send you videos of themselves masturbating..... or crosses your boundaries in other ways. But that anger subsides quickly. The type of anger I am talking about is seething, or volcanic anger. This type will blow a gasket in your heart or cause cancer in your body. Resentment will do the same thing. Even after cancer surgery, radiation and chemo, if your brain waves and way of thinking have not changed, the cancer will return. There has to be a change of behavior for healing to have occurred. If you are still doing the same thing the same way, there has been no healing.

It's Time

How long have you known your life could be better, but have not been able to do anything about it? I am committed to working with you, I promise to help you improve your life, but you have to do your part. You have daily and weekly work to do. With that commitment, I know I can help you improve your life, shift your thought patterns and focus so that you stop critiquing yourself and others. When you do, you begin to accept yourself as well. 

Have You Done It On Your Own?

I did it on my own. But it took me over 30 years to get there. Each of us has trauma and difficulties in our life. These are put in our lives to spur us on to greatness. Healing your life on your own could take several lifetimes. Tiger Woods, Elle MacPherson and Marilyn Monroe all had coaches for a reason. We need help getting there. 

Traditional therapy keeps you stuck in a paradigm of suffering and repeating your story. It does not move you  forward. I know I have done years of it. It did not help me. Repeating your story over again only perpetuates the energy that created it. 

From Albert Einstein:

"We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them."

No matter the type of trauma, abuse, addicted, abusive or absent parents, those issues can be overcome. I will lovingly hold your feet to the fire, lift your spirits, raise your vibrations through the different modalities that I have mastered that remove patterns, stuck and trapped emotions that keep you repeating the same things over and over. Until the trapped emotions are removed, you continue broadcasting on the same frequency, attracting more situations you don't want.

If it isn't cancer, diabetes, or sciatica that is plaguing you, it could be unhappiness in your relationships. This does not mean you need to dump the person you are with, necessarily, but look at things from a different perspective. Once you begin to shift, your partner will too! It only takes one person to heal a relationship. 

I am committed to help you grow, shift and refocus so that your life is one that is loving, fulfilling, happy and peaceful. If you saw me 40 years ago, you would never know that this ME, is the same person. Your soul is ready to be polished, sandblasted so that the hurts, and emotional baggage is eliminated and no longer running your world. I am so convinced that I can help you that I am offering a no risk guarantee. If you do your homework consistently and the exercises I give you consistently, I promise that your life will improve. 

Why You Want To Work With Someone Who Has Been There

There are all sorts of coaches out there who are certified. I have met them in mastermind groups and they are out there selling their products. When I sat down to talk to many of them, I found many have more issues than I did 20 years ago. You want to work with someone that has been there, healed their own lives with a proven track record and is happy in their life. Someone that models the behavior that they teach. Not someone who pays you lip service and does not walk the walk. If you don't believe me, I'll give you my mother's phone number and she will confirm all that I say is true. But you better hurry up, she is 92! 

I am ready to be in your corner to help you co-create a beautiful nurturing, loving joy and peace-filled life you absolutely adore! If you don't have the relationship you want now, or the life you want now, e-mail me. Set up a strategy session with me and we will get your life party started! Life is a game, you just have to know the rules. I will teach you all I have learned, which has changed my life and so many others! 

I committed my life to serving the upliftment of humanity's consciousness. This is my calling. Allow me to help you find yours. 

With all my love,

Jennifer

Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

Single Awareness Day - Valentine's Day

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

SAD = Single Awareness Day

Although Valentine's Day is fast approaching, millions of singles wonder if they will be alone forever? Pressure to find a date, mate or friend with benefits can build around February 14th. We don't have to be SAD. We can focus on the fact that we are all alone, wallow in self pity, or celebrate that we are alone! We can have a wonderful day knowing we are not dependent on another to tell us we are wonderful, beautiful and/or LOVED! There are great ways to enjoy being alone. Let's look at them one by one. 

I LOVE MY SOLITUDE!

Think of being alone from a positive mindset, following are the benefits to being alone: 

• there is no one to pick up after, no dirty underwear on your bedroom or bathroom floor to pick up with tweezers
• you don't have to clean razor shavings out of your bathroom sink, or mascara off the basin
• you don't sit down on the toilet and fall in, when they forgot to put the seat back down!
• you can leave the dirty dishes in the sink
• you can be grungy if you wish and not shower
• you don't have to wear makeup, or shave for guys
• you don't have to go to the gym and attempt to keep up with your partner
• you can eat what you want and not be concerned about the 1/2 pound of Godiva chocolate you consumed after dinner!
• you can meditate, or veg out and watch chick flicks, or action adventures all night long!
• you can listen to your music and not be concerned about whether "HE/SHE" likes or approves of your nerdy choices
• you don't have to wear your contacts or do your hair - who cares, right? You might feel better though if you take a shower, do your hair and look gorgeous for YOU! 
• you can go out with the girls (or guys) and enjoy a fun night without worrying about whether your date will get too drunk to have sex later
• you don't have to spend money on a card, or gift
• you can stay at home and masturbate, at least this way you will be sure to have an orgasm, unlike your friends! This one is A BONUS! 

Alone is not a bad place to be. Most of us don't take the time to really sink in and look at what we really want. It is easy to say what we DON'T WANT, but focusing on that only draws more of those we don't want who want to "fix," control or change us. 

Time To Take Stock

When we have the opportunity to spend time alone,  don't be afraid to sink inside and see yourself the way you really are.  We need to look at ourselves without judgment, recrimination or shame. When we do we can analyze our past; the good, the bad and the wonderful. Sometimes, we recognize the ones we let get away and wished we didn't. Other times we are grateful

we got away with our lives and psyches in tact, however difficult the repair and regrouping was afterward. There are ways to provide yourself with some self care, so that you enjoy the day, as you would any other day. When REAL love comes, it will be here in a flash, but you have to nurture and love yourself first.

The Benefits

Being alone has it's benefits. Buy yourself some flowers that you KNOW you will love! Indulge your desires and buy that $8.00 piece of Tiramisu!

I have lots of suggestions for the single person that wishes they had someone to love. My assertion is that you already do. It is YOU! If you are not kind and loving to you, how on earth can you ever expect another to be? When we constantly focus on being alone, alone is all we will ever be. Instead feeling that we already are love and have love in our lives, radiating that love outwards makes us a magnet for more good and better relationships. Below are two ways you can change up the way you feel about solitude for Valentine's Day. 

Nurture You

1. Bathe in chocolate, or hot water, whichever is easier to come by.
2. Light candles, play music that makes you feel happy.
3. Crank up the music have a glass of wine and dance to your heart's content!
4. Buy yourself some fresh veggies and something delicious at the grocery store. Prepare yourself a romantic dinner, just the way you like it!
5. Watch a movie you have been meaning to see.
6. Call a friend that makes you feel good or is alone also. Sending some love to another can help you feel better about your life and situation.
7. Call your mother, cousin, brother or relative that is also alone over Valentine's Day. Your phone call might just make them AND you feel better for the connection. 
8. Join some single friends for bowling, a movie or dancing. You can have lots of fun as a single person. Many guys don't like to dance. Here's your chance to do what you love.
9. Buy yourself a box of your favorite chocolates or your favorite dessert. Mine are Ferrero Roche and Tiramisu. I always buy myself something chocolate for Valentine's Day. That way I get what I want.
10. Go to the gym. Working out always makes us feel better about ourselves.
11. Take a road trip to a place you have been meaning to visit. 
12. Do a favorite activity that you can never seem to get anyone to do with you. Enjoy it to the fullest. Climb a mountain, go for a hike, a mountain bike ride, or a run. Swim at the club, take a sauna, pamper yourself.
13. Visit a friend you haven't seen in a while that loves you.
14. Do what you love. When we do what we love we nurture our soul. Often we spend so much time giving to others and doing what they want that we get lost. 
15. Be kind to yourself. You are worthy of love. You are lovable. You are beautiful. Expand on this feeling. The more you love you, the easier it is for someone else to do the same. 

Make a List of 100 - And Prepare

Most of us can quickly tell someone what we know we don't want in our lives. Focusing on what you truly want and writing it down will bring it much closer to being a reality than just wondering about it. I have a process I walk my clients through usually by the fourth or fifth week of practicing self love through loving thoughts

and mantras, energy clearings and catalyst work their list manifests

their heart's desire. The fact that you have focused on him or her, written down 100 criteria for you love, then doing the following manifestation exercise brings success in over 90% of those who spend the time to do the whole exercise completely.

1. Write a list of 100 criteria that you want in your Beloved. Don't short cut and write down only 30. Thing about your desires. Make it detailed. Short, tall, stocky, intelligent, witty, faithful/monogamous, water sign, blue eyes, successful, loves dogs, cat lover, bird lover, adventurer, loves to travel, likes to read, enlightened, self actualized, talented, spiritual, loving, generous, gay, straight, fit, healthy, creative, musical, sings, prays, meditates, polite, mannerly.....  great buns of steel.... you know!
2. Take that wonderful list of 100 and boil it down to 10 must haves. Yes sir! Why did I ask you to focus on 100 only to boil it down to 10? Because the Universe will pay attention to your list of 100, determine what is the best for you and bring you that. You want to boil it down to the 10 must haves so that you know what you really and truly desire in a partner.
3. Envision your Beloved. Feel what your life would be like with them in your life. Envision lying next to them in bed, making love, holding each other, the way that they smell and feel. Feel how different your life would be, how happy you would be to have them. Don't focus on a specific person - let that go. Your person could be someone you already know, or not....  then make a prayer to God, The Universe, the sun, moon or stars.... something like this, "I am open and ready to receive my Beloved partner. I know that miracles happen every day and I am ready to receive mine in perfect timing."
4. Let it go! Yes, you could do a vision board. Vision boards are wonderful for manifesting your desires. Look at your vision board every day and expand your heart. Feel the joy of having the love in your life. Say a prayer of thank you every day for the love in your life. (The worst thing you can do is have a mantra..... "I am always alone.....  why am I always alone. I will probably never have anyone who loves me." When you do, you attract more of being alone.

Prepare

Clean out your closet. Make room for your partner in your home. If your closet is stuffed to the gills, you don't have room for someone in your life. Read my post on Feng Shui for the bedroom to manifest a partner. Make sure you have two bedside tables, one on

either side of the bed. 

Fill yourself with love. Love yourself completely. When you love and accept yourself with all your flaws and faults you will also be able to love and accept another as they are. What you send out comes back to you like a boomerang. The next person you attract won't be trying to "fix" or change you (or vise versa,) because you except you! Energy always moves in a circle, ever outward, returning what you send out through your thoughts and beliefs.

Believe

What we believe we can achieve. You have heard it a million times. There is a reason. If you believe you will live alone the rest of your days, you will. If you believe your Divine partner is on his/her way to you - THEY ARE! 

Let's look at the timing. When the timing is perfect and you quit looking, someone will come from out of nowhere and be standing in front of you. Perhaps it is someone you have known for a long time, but never noticed, probably because you kept trying to draw from past experiences, repeating negative behaviors and codependency. When you love yourself fearlessly you will attract others that will love, respect and accept you for who you are. 

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Jennifer Elizabeth Masters is an author, inspirational speaker, radio host, sex, love and relationship coach with a focus on fearless love. She assists men and women to work through issues of trust, respect, acceptance, forgiveness. Working with Jennifer will bring love of life to you. She is an expert at orgasm, confidence, self love, worthiness, enlightenment, self actualization and spiritual living. Why? She has healed the following in herself and now lives joyously every day:

depression, anxiety, insomnia, worry, Fibromyalgia, low self esteem, negativity, sexual dysfunction, sexual trauma, feeling broken, lost, afraid....  E-mail her to have your free discovery session or to work through an issue JenniferElizabethMasters@gmail.com You can find her books on Amazon: Here

ALL Alone For The Holidays?

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

What is it about holidays that make everyone want to go home to visit? Once there, we wonder what ever possessed us to spend all that money on airfare or gas to listen to our parents' and siblings tell us all the things that we are doing wrong and how we need to live our lives differently. But that is family. They are the ones that know exactly how to push our buttons and get our goat. 

Sadly, many of us will be alone for the holidays. Children may be stateside when you are deployed.  Or your family may be in a foreign country and too far to visit during this time of year. For many of us, the holidays are a time when we experience depression, loneliness and sadness - even when with family. How then can we navigate Thanksgiving, Chanukah, Christmas or Kwanza without our loved ones and still enjoy ourselves?

Making The Best Of The Situation

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday for many reasons. Thanksgiving involves gratitude which I love. It also does not involve gift giving - so there is not a lot of financial stress over Thanksgiving, which is amazing. Thanksgiving involves cooking, eating and watching movies for me. The smell of a roasting turkey with stuffing in the oven, pies, whipped cream.....  it all makes my mouth water. Until I remember that my family is all going to be spread apart this Thanksgiving. However, planning and intent can change a situation that might end up being something really wonderful.

Days Of Holidays Past

I reminisce about Thanksgiving in Canada with my family. As soon as dinner was over the women would go and clear the table, getting coffee and dessert out. My oldest brother would disappear and fall asleep in someone's bed. He often over-eat, like Goldilocks find someone's soft bed to roll onto. He would go into a semi-coma after a big meal. I miss those days. It has been a long time since I enjoyed Thanksgiving in Canada with my family of origin.

A new Hartman Group study reveals that 46% of all adults eat alone. This growing trend shows a move towards a more solitary environment. One good thing about eating alone is that you won't get heartburn about what your mother, brother, sisters or brothers say to you over your meal. A peaceful candelight dinner for one can be enjoyable. Thanksgiving though, is another story. 

Traditional Thanksgiving Dinners

Buying a frozen dinner hoping it will substitute for a home-cooked meal will not thrill you. Even dining out alone in a restaurant doesn't sound exhilarating either. Here are some solutions for McDonalds, Jack In The Box and Taco Bell, Thanksgiving meals.

1. Find a local church that is doing a community dinner and join them.
2. Volunteer at a homeless shelter and bring a cooked turkey to add to the feast. This way, your home still smells like turkey and you will be contributing towards feeding the hungry. So it is a win-win for both sides.
3. Ask around in advance where your assistance could be needed at a church shelter or senior center. Warm bodies are always appreciated to serve with a smile. Helping out serves two purposes, you recognize what you have and you appreciate your life so much more. Giving back always makes you feel good!
4. Plan in advance so that you are not spending the whole day alone. Find a group to play games with or go for a walk with later in the day.
5. Take a spa vacation for two days. Pamper yourself by staying at a Hyatt or other plush hotel and treat yourself royally.
6. Play Christmas music that makes you feel good. 
7. Write Christmas cards and Thanksgiving cards and send them early to the ones you love. This old fashioned tradition is a lost art and will make you think of each person you won't see with a fondness. Put your heart into your message. Don't just sign your name.
8. Call those you miss and tell them you love them.
9. Watch movies that make you feel good. The happier the better. Laughter is good for the soul. Which is why I always watch National Lampoon Christmas Vacation every year, more than once.
10. Avoid drinking as it is a depressant. 
11. Buy some scented candles to make your home or apartment smell festive. 
12. Do things that you love and make you feel good. Treat yourself to special foods that you wouldn't normally cook. Like roasting a duck, or brussel sprouts.... something you really like.

Suggested Mirth in Movies

There are some really great holiday movies out that I recommend. Some are better than others and the ones I love best make me laugh and feel warm inside. These are the type I recommend for you.

1. National Lampoon Christmas Vacation - my family's favorite stupid Christmas movie. We watch it every year. It is a classic. A lot of laughs and Chevy Chase at his creative best.
2. Home For The Holidays. (1995) With Holly Hunter, Dylan McDermott, Anne Bancroft (full movie below)
3. The Holiday. With Cameron Diaz, Jude Law, Kate Winslet, Jack Black. Even if you don't like Jack Black, this movie has many redeeming qualities, like the fact that it is set in the most beautiful part of England and LA. Yes, it involves love. A chick flick, but funny and sweet at the same time.
4. Planes, Trains and Automobiles. Steve Martin and Beloved Canadian actor, John Candy. This movie is hilarious and heart warming.
5. Scrooge. Bill Murray. 
6. The Santa Clause. Tim Allen. Although this could be construed as a kids movie, it is a happy, feel good movie. The kind you want to watch when you are all alone.
7. Dutch. Ed O'Neill. Thanksgiving movie. Ok. You might want to kill the kid at some point in the movie, but it gets better.
8. The Family Man. Nicolas Cage, Tea Leoni. Wealthy Wall Street trader, living the high life. His life is changed totally over night when he wakes up in suburbia married to his old girlfriend - with children. Great lessons, love over money. Happiness over the material. Funny, heartwarming.
9. Holiday Inn. Bing Crosby. Yes, it's old, but it's a feel good real Christmas movie.
10. How The Grinch Stole Christmas. Jim Carrey. 
11. Elf. Yes, it stars Will Ferrell, but wonderful warm and heart opening ending. Ed Asner plays Santa - well.
12. A Charlie Brown Christmas. Sweet and a tradition.
13. Home Alone. I couldn't leave this one off.

Jennifer Elizabeth Masters is an author, life, love and sex coach. Orgasm For Life can be found on Amazon. She also is wonderful at keeping you accountable, helping you focus, get organized and become empowered. Her early life was challenging. She struggled with low self esteem and codependency. Now Jennifer is a powerful, strong woman who empowers women and men to get to know, love and accept themselves. This is the source of true happiness. When we love ourselves, our capacity to love and experience JOY grows also. Jennifer can be reached through her private e-mail here: JenniferElizabethMasters@gmail.com  or visit her website:

JenniferElizabethMasters.com You can become a part of her community on FaceBook here.

I have written a guest post for OBGYN retired, Dr. Don Ketterhagen. Here is the link:
The Keys To Happiness

Overcoming Neediness

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

You are on a first date. He seems amazing.  You can't wait to call him or text him to set up a second date. You inundate him with text  and phone messages. Then he doesn't call. What happened?

You might even text him a few times afterward saying how wonderful an evening you had. WRONG! One text saying you had a great time, "Thank you for a great evening." is fine. Anything more than one text is needy.

Give it time. Give it space. Breathe. Keep your feet on the ground. Notice and reflect on the date. Remember what he said to you. Did he listen, or was he texting someone else while on his date with you? 

When we are needy we tend to blow up and make insignificant things significant. We begin to think about spending the rest of our life with this person. We may even try his name on for size and wonder what our children will look like. Yet, we have only had one date. We might embellish their personality traits, overlooking their flaws. We also have a tendency to over look red flags. We need to remove our rose colored glasses that make him look better than he really is.

Instead of chasing a man, let him chase you. Men love the chase. When we are too available, too easy or always around, they don't have to chase. They become the fat lazy dog, that doesn't have to work for it. Men don't like that. They love the thrill of the hunt. Allow him to come to you. Allow him to miss you, think about you and make the first move after he has met you. Allow the man to be the man. Yes, this is the 21st century. But some things never change. Men's makeup is one of them. Men are the hunters and gatherers. Allow them to be the man. 

Neediness is very unattractive. Men find it a huge turnoff. How can we overcome our needy tendencies?

What is The Underlying Cause of Neediness?

Personal insecurities cause us to feel needy. When we feel we are not enough, unworthy or have low self esteem, we undervalue ourselves. We feel we have to take whatever we can get. We feel we need to settle, because we are afraid we will be alone. We are often so afraid of being alone that we will accept less than we deserve.

Our Mind Makes Up Stories

Our mind creates scenarios about possibilities with people in our lives. We can get carried away with these stories. Living in fantasy is not real. It is not healthy to follow these stories and embellish what is real. Being stuck in daydreams can cause us pain. Instead stop and breathe. Just be. Living in daydreams takes us away from reality. It drains our energy. Compulsive thoughts can stop us from really living. Stopping these day dreams will give us more energy. Instead watch and witness what is happening. 

How Can I Stop Being Needy?

1. Relax and just allow things to unfold naturally.
2. Stop trying to push a new relationship into something that it's not. 
3. Enjoy each moment of a new relationship. It is only new once.
4. Be patient. 
5. Take off the rose colored glasses. See this new person as they are - human with imperfections. 
6. Do not contact them more than they contact you. 
7. Do not suffocate your new found love. Give them space. Know that absence makes the heart grow fonder. Don't try to spend every waking moment with them. 
8. Do the things that you love to do. Exercise, spend time with your friends too. 
9. If the other person tells you that they are not interested, or stop calling you, let them go. Don't try to reel them back in - by doing things to get them interested in you.
10. Find a spiritual practice to help sustain you. I meditated every day. This meditation helped to fill the emptiness, I used to feel. The Divine Presence Process Meditation
11. Find other things to keep yourself busy. Do what you love. Many of us put aside our own desires putting the relationship in first place. Your needs are important. Do not make another more important than yourself.

Raising Your Confidence

Growing internally needs to be your number one priority. Know that it is okay to be alone. If you don't love being alone with you, how can you expect anyone else to? Find something that you love to do, that fills your soul whenever you feel alone. No one is responsible for your happiness, but you. Make an intention each day to feel strong, whole and complete. No relationship or other person can fill you with happiness permanently. 

Happiness comes from within. Each of us is responsible for making ourselves happy. Knowing yourself well - spending time getting to know you and choosing to love yourself changes everything. We are our own worst critics. Yet there is nothing broken or wrong with us. There is nothing wrong with anything. We just make choices for ourselves. When we know ourselves as love, we stop looking for love outside of ourselves. As we begin to expand in this love we make different choices for ourselves. You will begin to experience yourself in a new reality.

Letting go can feel scary. We don't have to know everything as we move through life. The not knowing is a new place to be. Know that you are not a victim or a martyr. Let go of the self persecution. Just recognize that we do these things to ourselves. Our thoughts of condemnation. You have limitless resources inside of you. Awareness changes everything. You will begin to notice, and just say to yourself, "I see that within me." Loving yourself, thanking it, with love and gratitude will allow you to move into harmony, rather than disharmony.

Here are some ways to change your perspective. We create our own life. You are already worthy. You are already enough. The more you love and accept yourself, the more beautiful you feel, love radiates from within. You experience yourself as being FREE, rather than trapped. You are safe. The more you love yourself the more you attract love to you. 

Give Your Confidence A Boost!

1. Take responsibility for your own happiness. No one can make you happy. 
2. Know that our relationships mirror what is going on inside of us. Ask questions to discover more about yourself.
3. Be compassionate towards yourself. 
4. Let go of judgment and control of yourself and others. 
5. Forgive Yourself. The Ho'oponopono Prayer is below.
6. Breathe. Deep breathing brings you into the present with conscious breath. 
7. Stop focusing on the past. Let go of your stories most of them are not real.
8. Allow yourself to FEEL. When we rail against feeling, our emotions get stuck in our body. Allow your energy to MOVE.
9. Spend time doing what you love. 
10. Nurture yourself each day. Take salt baths by candlelight, read, meditate. Spend time doing what fills your soul every day.
11. Use either mantra:  I AM WHOLE AND COMPLETE AS I AM.   or I AM STRONG!
12. Spend time alone. Don't look for a new relationship until you are sure you won't repeat old patterns. 
13. Experience yourself and your life, rather than judge.
14. Stop striving for perfection. Each of us is human, which means we will never be perfect. 
15. Embrace all of who you are, rather than trying to cut out the parts of you that you don't like.
16. Stop pushing your energy. Surrender into each moment. Feel what you are feeling. Drop inside to feel what you are feeling.
17. Be grateful. When we are grateful for what we have, our vibrant health each day...  more good comes to you.
18. Be authentic without fear. The more authentic you are, the happier you will be with your life. It is exhausting trying to please everyone and be what we feel others want us to be.

Ho'oponopono Prayer - For Forgiveness

Forgiveness is not a form of correcting, but rather letting go of the attachment to the past events in our lives that we have had reactions and judgement towards. Our reactivity towards events in our lives will begin to diminish. As we begin to shift our reality, we are triggered. We can choose differently how we react to events in our lives. Life is always and in every way working FOR you, rather than TO you. Life is our teacher. Learning to observe our lives with different eyes, changes everything. Use a softer focus or lens to view your life. View yourself with eyes of love, rather than judgment.

I am sorry

Please forgive me

I love you

Thank you.

When you feel ready to change paradigms to move out of fear and control, Jennifer can help you shift realities. She can help you get beyond where you are currently. You are far greater than you know. Jennifer can help you step into your BIG self, your High Self. 

Jennifer Elizabeth Masters is the author of Orgasm For Life. She is a life, love and sex coach. She has been a hypnotherapist since 1998, an energy healer since 2007, a certified life coach since 2011. Her website is: http://www.JenniferElizabethMasters.com