Sunday, February 28, 2016

How To Be Your Own Lover After A Breakup

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

Coaching my 19-year-old daughter for the past four months after a damaging breakup has brought the anguish and heartbreak to my door. When we don't feel loved by our partner, we feel inadequate. When we face rejection, betrayal or abandonment in our relationship, how can we take care of ourselves?


First of all, you must know that once love exists it can never be taken away, no matter what another believes. Love is. Love is energy, not an emotion. Loving yourself through the aftermath takes compassion, gentleness and acceptance.

You Are Enough!

No matter what happens in life, you are already enough. You are whole and complete. There is nothing to do, nothing to change, nothing to eradicate. You are enough. When we focus on the pain, what went wrong, trying to be a Monday morning quarterback, rehashing all that you should have done, and asking yourself why only serves to make you feel worse. 

You Are Loved

Love exists as a vibrational energy. Love is in every plant, tree, a blade of grass, molecule, atom and breath you take. Breathe in love. The Divine loves you. Source energy loves you. The angels love you. The plants and trees love you. You are important on this planet.

You Are Unique

Trying to be different to please someone else means you aren't you. Be the best version of you that you can. Don't apologize for being you. You have your talents, abilities, and personality. You may be quirky like me, maybe even a little bit weird, that's okay. Be YOU! Be yourself fully. Speak your truth. Allow your authentic voice to speak. Speak your personal truth. There is no need to change who you are for another, it only weakens your power. 

Be Gentle

Often we can be our worst critic. Harsh words or thoughts directed towards yourself for what you did or didn't do are not loving. Soften your gaze when you look at yourself. Hold yourself in a loving, gentle energy of love. Know you did the best you could. Be kind. Be loving and be gentle to you.

Look For The Silver Lining

When we feel damaged, broken or hurt it is easy to blame and feel that the breakup and even relationship was a waste of time. Nothing is a waste of time. You learned something from this experience. There is always a gift and a lesson. Look under the pile of crap for the gift. It is in there. Find it. Write about it, but love yourself through the process. 
Love Is Always Present

No matter whether you have been told that you are not loved by your partner, or whether you have been cheated on, there is still love there. Love cannot end. It exists. Anger may mar the feeling of love. Betrayal may make you feel hurt, angry, broken. Once love
Is shared between two people it is always there. Even in death love remains. When I read The Akashic Records for others, I feel the love between two people. I also feel the love that Source energy has for you. It is tremendous and unending. Know you are loved. 


Focus

I noticed with my daughter that her boyfriend telling her he didn't love her was her total focus. When I tapped into the energy he was holding, I felt anger. Anger was his focus. However, under the anger was love. Deep, unending love. Have you ever noticed after your anger clears you still feel love? It is because it is always present. No matter what is said. You always have a choice. What you choose to focus your attention, however, is what forms your world and beliefs. Choose to focus on being enough. Focus on thoughts that empower you, and make you feel whole, rather than broken. 

Healing Mantras

Your broken damaged heart is real. You may feel damaged beyond belief. I feel for you. There are several things you can do to help your body-mind-spirit feel less broken. Mantras heal the mind. They also shift your heart. They may sound simple but have great power. Here are a few to repeat slowly when you are meditating, first wake up or right before sleep. Using mantras when your mind is in neutral allows them to slip into your unconscious mind that is the software for your life creating your outer world. 

  • I am loved
  • I am safe
  • I am secure
  • I love me
  • I am whole
  • I am perfect
  • I am powerful
  • I am strong
  • I am harmonious
  • I am loving
  • I am happy
  • I am big, not small
  • I am powerful, not weak
  • I am beautiful
  • I am loved

I have been where you are. I know how betrayal feels. I know how it feels to be heartbroken and an emotional mess. I have tremendous compassion for you. An energy clearing can shift you within one hour. An Akashic Record reading and healing can allow you to feel deeply loved immediately. Just having one session can give you clarity, lift the darkness and negativity from your soul to help you feel more alive, focused, centered and loved. Perhaps you are ready to begin a coaching program to shift your mindset. Send me an e-mail and let's set up a FREE discovery session to find out if my work is a good fit for you. 

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clearing anger, depression, anxiety, money issues and love....
I can feel the energy through your words. They are very well done. I felt like I was melting into the chair. My energy level is way up and I have been using the mantras. I am feeling happier. Thank you! John.

The Cascade of Miracles Prayer is amazing. I have begun using it for others. Everytime I say it, wonderful things materialize for me as if as a bonus! Thank you Jennifer! Cynara M. 
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